Looking for my place

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Jim Eshelman
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Re: Looking for my place

Post by Jim Eshelman » Sun Feb 25, 2018 12:49 pm

martin88 wrote:
Sun Feb 25, 2018 12:27 pm
I wonder which part of my horoscope talks about depression/negative thoughts? I was really a happy go lucky child then I became a teen and life has been a miserable suffering safe for 2013-2014 when I felt great on an antidepressant. Curiosly that AD no longer works, nor do others I’ve been prescribed. Late 2013-early 2014 was the only good moment in my life since I became a teen and succumed to mental ilness (they still can’t diagnose what’s wrong with me but constant rumminsting is a sign sth has broken down). Sheltered life, adrenals, thyroid, I have lost hope of ever finding out why are my positive emotions so weak or non existant why my negative ones are hyperactive. No one has told me what changed when I was 13.
Your chart is not a depressive natal chart - quite the contrary. It would be expected to be upbeat, vigorous, vital, optimistic. The markers are quite clear.

At most, it is your nature to feel things very strongly - the Cancer Sun and angular Moon, for example, plus the visceral nature of the Sun-Mars-Jupiter etc.

The only thing depressive, despite being 0°00' orb, is the very minor Moon-Saturn semi-sextile. I mentioned this before, but I'm still not inclined to take it as far weaker than Moon's opposition to the angular Jupiter.

So... I'd turn the question around. Did something specific happen? Was there an event that was traumatic or turned your world-view around some way? If your birth time is anywhere accurate (even within an hour either way), I wouldn't change my basic read of it.

So... everything was fine until 2001, yes? There were, of course, hormone changes; is there a close family member who suffers depression? Something inherited and biochemical that puberty could have triggered? (Even that, I think, should show in the chart.) Your 2001 Solar Return is harsh - Saturn-Pluto across the horizon, plus Mars. Moon at Midheaven. It could easily be the chart of a traumatic loss or separation (or even of an invasive sexual molestation... just guessing from the symbolism). Did something occur?

Transits don't show anything in particular for that time, aside from the Solar Return.
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Re: Looking for my place

Post by martin88 » Tue Feb 27, 2018 4:25 am

My grandma died in 2002. Apart from that no. 2002 was a very bad year - school bullying etc. 2003 was great though, 2004-2012 not so. 2013 was wonderful and early 2014 too. I think my grandmother on my mother’s side and my mother both were/are depression/OCD/anxiety-prone.

On relocation I think my heart tells me either out of Europe, back to my home country or Germany but I’m not that sure on the third option. I have easier time communicating with non Europeans. :) Culturally the UK also is well-known by me but my background might be problematic there like in most of Western Europe. The thing is I prefer smiley, bubbly people that are not so found in Europe as outside.

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Re: Looking for my place

Post by Arena » Tue Feb 27, 2018 12:57 pm

martin88, there is also one more possibility to explain your feelings over there. Your birth time may not necessarily be precisely recorded.

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Re: Looking for my place

Post by martin88 » Thu Mar 01, 2018 2:04 am

Well it’s deffinitely true the Netherlands felt like Pluto line so 9:10 to 9:17 sounds about right. The official one is 9:15. People have mellowed with me somewhat in Bratislava and the toxic ones started leaving. But Jupiter line was easier for wirk and felt less moody.

Lately I’ve looked at the Baltics as their cities are more similar to my home city - greener than most European capitals. But also not as dense as most of Europe which sounds nice. I like the feeling of space similar to Canada and USA.

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Re: Looking for my place

Post by martin88 » Sat Mar 03, 2018 10:18 am

I think I just hold on to my childhood. Therefore I am looking for places that look either like my home town or American as I was mostly exposed to Bulgarian and American culture growing up. I also had many disappointing experiences with Europeans. I no longer feel comfortable in their presence really, so my future choise is go to the USA or go back home. I just treasure the cultural experiences I had in my childhood way more than recent ones. I lived for 3 years in the Netherlands and yet I don’t hold anything Dutch dear. When looking for places to travel I always ask “does it look like Sofia?”, “does it look like the USA?”. Unfortunately the parts of Europe that are economically stable don’t look neither like Sofia nor like Plovdiv, Burgas, Dallas, Minneapolis or LA.

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Re: Looking for my place

Post by martin88 » Mon Mar 05, 2018 3:30 am

I think Minneapolis has very good lines for me but the climate is terrible for my vata dosha - too cold in winter and I suppose windy. Maybe St Louis is warmer? I have no lines in Dallas and rest of Texas but the climate is perfect for me.

I need hot or humid or at least hot, with not much wind. Back in Europe I think Plovdiv (Athens is too windy, while the Baltics are too cold and windy). I only know English good enough so what about the UK? I’ve no lines there but my sun goes to the 12th in my relocation chart? Weather is very windy but not as cold and moist (with Vata dosha I need moisture and warmth). I’d need to buy a sun lamp though. I loved London for a week.

As Vata doshais dry, cold and airy/windy I have to avoid cold, windy, dry places. So that’s why I dread Bratislava winters - so cold AND windy! But even in the Netherlands I felt very cold. Unfortunately in most of Europe you can’t have a good, sunny climate and good, stable economy. I hope and pray for getting a green card! :)

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Re: Looking for my place

Post by Jim Eshelman » Mon Mar 05, 2018 7:22 am

martin88 wrote:
Mon Mar 05, 2018 3:30 am
I think Minneapolis has very good lines for me but the climate is terrible for my vata dosha - too cold in winter and I suppose windy. Maybe St Louis is warmer? I have no lines in Dallas and rest of Texas but the climate is perfect for me.
Yes, your Sun line cuts a bit east of Minneapolis, a bit west of St. Louis, and then down through eastern Arkansas and central Louisiana. Sun and Moon lines cross at the border between Missouri and Arkansas, near Springfield, Missouri.

Yes, Minneapolis is biting, piercing cold in winters. St. Louis would be more moderate - still could be cold in winters, but not nearly AS cold, while the summers tend to be hot and very humid.

Your Sun and Moon remain within about 5° of the angles in, say, Houston. Not super close, but they are the dominant factors (and have a nearly exact mundane square that strengthens the overall effect).
I need hot or humid or at least hot, with not much wind.
Well, St. Louis might be perfect. I detest humidity, which is why I live in a great city that is a barely-irrigated desert :) Areas like St. Louis, or even New Orleans (which has much milder winters than St. Louis), fit your description very well.

St. Louis summers have days that average a high of 88 and low of 68 (all Fahrenheit), with record high/low of 105 and 52. The winters average 22 to 40 in the course of a day, with records of -12°/70°. There are no dry months, and it gets humidity from the Mississippi River.

New Orleans summers, on average, have a los of 75, high of 91. Record summer extremes are 65 to 99 (so it's always about the same). Winter average low/high is 44/66, with records at 21/80 (more variation). It is much wetter than St. Louis and there are no dry months.

Minneapolis (just to frighten you :) ) has average low/high for January of 6°/24° (yes, its average high is about the same as New Orleans' average low), with record low/high being -32°/53°. Summer days typically run from 62 to 83, with records of 46/101. Winters tend to be on the dry side because rainfall is turned to snow which sucks a lot of the moisture out of the air.
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Re: Looking for my place

Post by martin88 » Mon Mar 05, 2018 7:54 am

It is hard to get a visa though for now...
As for Europe I am starting to backtrack and to consider returning back to my own country but to a warmer, sunnier town so Plovdiv fits the bill.
Someone told me this:

Vienna, for instance, your Moon is on the I.C. but Saturn/Uranus are in the 4th house. Both Saturn and Uranus in the 4th indicate a lot of difficulties in a relocated location, Lee ranks Uranus in the 4th as one of the worst places for a relocation and Saturn close behind, so it could very well be that your difficult experiences on your 'Moon line' are really attributed to Saturn/Uranus in the 4th, which would make sense. But it is still possible to have Moon on the I.C. but with Saturn/Uranus in the 5th in some locations.

**

In England, you have Leo rising but with Sun in the 12th. The Saturn/Uranus is not in the 4th which is good but Pluto is very close to the I.C. The Midheaven is still in Taurus though, which is quite typical for you in lots of Europe and puts Venus+Saturn dynamic still in the forefront.

You’ve actually got two amazing double Sun/Jupiter and Jupiter/Sun paran crossing lines next to eachother at 49n54 and 49n08. Somewhere like Nuremburg (or anywhere of that latitude) sits right in the middle of them.

Parans? What are those all about? All I get is Europe except Bulgaria is wasteland for me and I best go to Australia or the USA. Germany might be not as bad as the others but the climate is still terrible in the winter. :/

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Re: Looking for my place

Post by Jim Eshelman » Mon Mar 05, 2018 8:35 am

Houses are hard enough to validate as meaningful in the best of circumstances. Though it is a popular idea among Tropical astrologers that relocated house placements are meaningful, I've never seen it justified and, in fact, evidence is usually quite the opposite.

My own chart is an excellent example of this, Nearly half the planets shift significantly moving from Indiana to California, and those shifts are exactly the opposite of the reality. For example, my exact Jupiter-Uranus conjunction in the 11th House, if it has any actual meaning, refers to such things as my significant success in certain kinds of organization (all Uranian themed). This is a solid 11th House placement at birthplace, shifts to partile conjunct 12th cusp in Los Angeles, yet all that success in 11th House matters has been in California. Or, in LA my Sun is solidly established in the 2nd House, which normally would make my life especially centered on 2nd House matters; unless you call growing up and getting a real job a "2nd House matter," nothing could be further from the truth: My natal picture of that house is much more representative. Moving my Mercury-Saturn conjunction from mid-2nd to mid-3rd is minimally meaningful but also has strong contradictions, e.g., it was the location where traditional 3rd House matters improved and limitations moved out of the way.

Now, most of these "shifts" could be related simply to the fact that I arrived here at age 20 and then seriously moved into adulthood. My point, though, is that, despite this, the relocated houses, if anything, are the opposite of what is true. (The angularities, though, are dead-on!) - This is only one example, but one well-known to me. (I'm just glancing at my mate's chart, relocated from New York to the West Coast. The relocated house placements are also quite wrong.)

So... I wouldn't worry about a house placement of Uranus. Keep it simple.
martin88 wrote:
Mon Mar 05, 2018 7:54 am
You’ve actually got two amazing double Sun/Jupiter and Jupiter/Sun paran crossing lines next to eachother at 49n54 and 49n08. Somewhere like Nuremburg (or anywhere of that latitude) sits right in the middle of them.

Parans? What are those all about?
Parans are mundane aspects formed when two planets are on angles simultaneously. For example, in Los Angeles I have Jupiter and Uranus rising every day at exactly the same minute Sun crosses IC. This is like having Sun exactly square my Jupiter-Uranus, which is quite a sublime aspect. - My Venus on IC provides the longitude on the globe, and my Sun-Jupiter-Uranus paran provides the latitude. (This is recreated only one other habitable spot: Sydney is 90° longitude away, so Venus moves to WP instead of IC, and it is 34° South instead of LA's 34° North, so I get a different Sun-Jupiter-Uranus paran.)

Solar Fire does let us put paran lines on an astromap. You have about two dozen different parans through the bands of latitude covering Europe. For example, at the latitude of Amsterdam, where you had some difficulties, you have Venus-Saturn and Sun-Mars parans. For cities we discussed above, St. Louis has a Jupiter-Pluto paran (like a Jupiter-Pluto natal aspect for the location). BTW, I'm only looking at the very close ones, exact within minutes of arc generally - there are several others nearby that would be operative, e.g., the Moon-Sun paran is quite close in St. Louis also. Nothing in particular in New Orleans or Minneapolis.
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Re: Looking for my place

Post by martin88 » Mon Mar 05, 2018 12:18 pm

Lol it gets more and more complicated. I think I might go for simplicity. Someone told me I have in my horoscope an aspect or a planet in a house that translates as “bad experiences with foreigners”.

Unfortunately most of my encounters with foreigners have been unpleasant, especially with Europeans... to the point I no longer feel comfortable around some. It’s bad to close yourself but really I’m fed up. My favorite is getting no responses when looking for a rent after I answer “Where are you from?”. People from immigrant societies like Canada and USA, and those from Asia or Africa generally have been nicer to me, kinder even. Well not as much East coaster US ones lol but they’re kinda European-like ;) I’m actively starting to hate all of Europe except my home country. The Slavic countries like Czech Republic and Slovakia are outrightly xenophobic. Too bad they’re turning me xenophobic to Europeans. Fear breeds fear.

So yeah really disillusioned with all things European, people are the best advertisements of their culture. I hope in the US I’m not treated like a second class citizen. It’s really ridiculous but I can be naughty too, I’ll refuse to answer where I’m from if it comes from an European. Crazy place this old world. I can see the US with the occasional vacation in Bulgaria as the best bet, why waste my money to travel to places I’m unwelcome? Americans in general are more trusting to strangers, especially in Texas and California. They smile more and have better customer service. I never can trust a doctor in Europe anyway, yes they’re cheap but I end up having to use naturopaths anyway. Not sure about St Louis people if they’re nice and friendly?

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Re: Looking for my place

Post by Danica » Mon Mar 05, 2018 2:29 pm

martin88 wrote:
Mon Mar 05, 2018 12:18 pm
I’m actively starting to hate all of Europe except my home country. The Slavic countries like Czech Republic and Slovakia are outrightly xenophobic. Too bad they’re turning me xenophobic to Europeans. Fear breeds fear.
I sincerely doubt hating any particular group of people can bring you any good.
Also, nobody can turn you xenophobic if you yourself do not want to be xenophobic.
QUID VOLIS ILUD FAC

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Re: Looking for my place

Post by Danica » Mon Mar 05, 2018 2:38 pm

P.S. When someone asks me "where are you from" and I sense a ready prejudice in their question, I just answer with "from planet Earth, Solar System, the Milky Way galaxy".
Not only is it the truth, but it has a beautiful effect of shocking them and throwing them off the track :lol:
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Re: Looking for my place

Post by martin88 » Tue Mar 06, 2018 3:53 am

Good tip, I was actually thinking about that reply!
So France and Germany are best avoided as well?
I know I have best lines in the Canary islands but I’ve only learned English and French to good levels. I stufied Spanish but I struggle with the vocabulary which is not as close to French as I expected. Also watched a lot of German TV as a child so the UK, Ireland, Germany and France are the ones that I can realistically settle down in in Europe. For me it’d be better to learn the language beforehands.

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Re: Looking for my place

Post by martin88 » Tue Mar 06, 2018 10:13 am

This sounds discouraging:
With a Taurus Midheaven, it forces your Venus to be the ruler of your Midheaven related things, such as your public appearance, social standing etc. This might be great for someone with a strong, harmonious Venus. But someone who has a stressed out Venus, then the Midheaven functions in a more difficult way.”

In Europe I either have bad positions, bad lines or good lines in dirt poor places where no ine wants to live with impossible for me to learn languages.
So everything points to anything out of Europe being better places for me yet why is it so hard to get there? I’ve a US college degree and experience in an American company yet it seems like I’m stuck in Europe. Canada is easier but the climate is terrible so US or Australia are my sanest otions. Of course I’vealways have the option to go back home, but there I get wanderlust.

If on my Moon IC line I feel like crap maybe it’s a cultural mismatch. Many Americans say the customer service here is rude and brassy and I get offended, too.

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Re: Looking for my place

Post by Jim Eshelman » Tue Mar 06, 2018 10:43 am

martin88 wrote:
Tue Mar 06, 2018 10:13 am
With a Taurus Midheaven, it forces your Venus to be the ruler of your Midheaven related things, such as your public appearance, social standing etc.
You keep relying on things that I'm certain are invalid. House rulerships are top of the list of things that have devastated much of modern astrology. Don't be discouraged by a fiction.
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Re: Looking for my place

Post by martin88 » Fri Mar 09, 2018 6:20 pm

Re: Depression, someone told me in my birth chart they can see weak adrenals (how can they see that? :D )? I had one burnout before so I'm sure I have the weak adrenals. There is a suggestion tricyclic antidepressants work on more people than SSRIs because they affect the norepinephrine - a hormone produced in the adrenals! I felt great on a tricyclic, I was literally my old self before my depression started in my teens! :)

As for immigration as this is the main subject here, at this point I have PTSD-like symptoms even when thinking about Europe or I get angry as the painful memories are triggered so I'd either go back to my home country or seek the New world immigrant societies only. The only country in Europe for me is my home one. I've never felt any connection to any European country whatsoever anyway so good riddance! The only way I even consider Europe is that it's the most accessible - no visas and it's an hour-two max. flight from my birth city.

My heart deffinitely likes Latin American, North American and Australian cultures much more! I wonder why that psychic told me I'll stay in Europe but never live back home? She said Germany but I'm sure I'm done with Europe. And I'm too bored at this point to study any extra laguage. :mrgreen:

Europe is too crowded and urban for me, I hate medieval architecture with a passion and I need sun + stable economy which is not the case with sunny European countries.

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Re: Looking for my place

Post by Jim Eshelman » Fri Mar 09, 2018 7:04 pm

martin88 wrote:
Fri Mar 09, 2018 6:20 pm
Re: Depression, someone told me in my birth chart they can see weak adrenals (how can they see that? :D )? I had one burnout before so I'm sure I have the weak adrenals.
That would normally be a high stress or over-depletion of Mars. They were probably looking at your Mars-Neptune square. - That's not a guarantee of a problem, of course (I have a closer Mars-Neptune square and no such problem), but it does show a vulnerability in Mars matters.
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Re: Looking for my place

Post by martin88 » Sat Mar 10, 2018 5:32 am

Great, thank you!
I read someone else's experience on their Moon IC line and they also have experienced rudeness by locals. So one cannot trust Astro.com's interpretations about Moon lines. As I only have Moon, Pluto and Jupiter lines in Europe elsewhere seems more appropriate as I think for me a Sun line might be much better than a Jupiter one. Jupiter is the easiest of these of course, but I'm certain I'd never live on any of those other countries on my Jupiter line in Eastern Europe while it passes trough my country where I know the language perfectly and I have relatives. It just makes no sense to go to a similarly struggling economy where you know no one and don't even have a gasp of the language.

Of all my Sun lines USA seems the best as I know English and I like American culture. After having seen a year of Slovaks being rude, ignoring my "Hellos" (in THEIR language!) while shopping and not replying, looking at me with disgust, etc. I'd like nothing to do with European cultures, for the sake of my sanity. Even in London my host family told me we steal their jobs to my face. :roll: I mean how much abuse and rudeness can you get? I think the Czechs have the same closed/rude/cold culture like Slovaks unfortunately. Or they're just closed/rude to me and those places/people don't resonate with me. How can you boost your low self-confidence if you see so much coldheartedness and rudeness?

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Re: Looking for my place

Post by Jim Eshelman » Sat Mar 10, 2018 9:07 am

martin88 wrote:
Sat Mar 10, 2018 5:32 am
I read someone else's experience on their Moon IC line and they also have experienced rudeness by locals.
FWIW, I was born with an angular Moon (like you), and so spent my first 19 years living where Moon was angular. I suppose I could agree with your interpretation, except I never thought of it that way. Since it was the only thing I knew, I simply took it that "this is how people are." I did learn, by soon after puberty, that I wasn't like everyone else around me and there were always going to be frictions, but my Aquarius Moon just took a special glee in being the person who was "out" with respect to everyone else.

I've never thought of it as "living under a Moon line" so much as "having an angular Moon at birth." Everything I can describe from it is stuff that has stayed with me the rest of my life, though perhaps in different proportions (and with different perspectives than I had as a kid. I've never wanted to return other than for very rare and brief visits, but, objectively, I don't think the people are rude.

What I do know is that I'm naturally acutely sensitive. I take in and respond to my physical, psychological, and psychic environment very powerfully. I'm unclear whether this gets even stronger when I return to my birth area, or whether very old psychological patterns get restimulated. But it's not that the people are rude; its mostly that they have a culture and political perspective I deeply feel the entire world needs to move past, and partly because I feel things more acutely in the area.

I haven't spent great periods of time in areas where Moon is closer to the angle than it was at birth, but three instances come to mind. I spent a couple of weeks in Iowa City, had a family vacation through the Ozarks focused on an aunt's house in Hayti, Missouri, and spent a week in New Orleans. (Oh, another vacation through upstate Wisconsin for another aunt, I forget the town.) I can't think of a lot of distinction from where I was born, though there was some. After living in Los Angeles, the visits to Iowa City and New Orleans were marked by feeling things more powerfully (which matched circumstances of the visits also). The other two were family-themed, which is lunar on its own, though my filters as a kid were that we were getting away for a vacation to see a new place and stay with an aunt and uncle each time.
How can you boost your low self-confidence if you see so much coldheartedness and rudeness?
It might indeed be that you are a mismatch for their culture. Or it may be how you are stuck on perceiving them, on hearing them.

Some of these reactions are because people don't really understand the customs of other people. In some cases, this is simple stuff: One area prides itself on hospitality and says hi to whoever they see and regard you as a rude outside if you don't. Other areas regard that as invasive and think greater respect is shown my not intruding on strangers.

In the aftermath of the LA riots in the '90s, some interesting cultural differences became obvious as different groups began having meetings to discuss feelings that led to the riots. In particular, cultural differences between Afro-American and Korean cultures became obvious (a big part of those riots was when largely black mobs streamed north into Korean areas of the city burning and looting). One cultural difference discovered was a real eye-opener to many: (1) American culture generally has a retailer place change in the customer's hand. (2) Korean culture regards touching a customer that way as disrespectful, and they would place it on the counter for the cutomer to pick up. (3) Black customers in Korean businesses widely reported feeling insulted when they expected change put in their hand, the Korean merchants wouldn't do this, those black communities already were feeling put-down and hated, and just took it as racial hatred that someone wouldn't even touch their hand to put change in it. Fights actually came out of this when the customer thought they were being picked on because they were black, and the Korean merchants became indignant and defensive.

You can see how this could escalate. I wonder if that story is of any use to you in filtering your experiences in some of these areas.
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Re: Looking for my place

Post by martin88 » Sun Mar 11, 2018 3:32 am

Thank you, Jim! I think I've been more influenced by "New world" cultures than by European ones outside of my own. Sure, films and TV are not very true to reality, but I expect friendly, chatty customer service and people in general which is not the norm in most of Europe. I also prefer less density and dread medieval architecture which is more present here. Those medieval city centers feel just very cold to me, and they often have no trees on the streets. Bulgaria is less dense than most European countries, stores work even on national holidays and up late like in most of the USA. We also love our cars just as much and most of us hate using public transport. We also want more lax gun laws to protect our homes lately after a guy was arrested for shooting a robber. So you could say in some ways we're closer to the USA and Latin America than say to Central and North Europe. :lol:

Here's what I found, in Europe going more east might be more benefitial.
Sofia compared to my relocation chart for Plovdiv are alsmost identical, but a few differences:

2nd House is in Virgo in Sofia while in Libra in Plovdiv
8th House is in Pisces (Sf) while in Aries (Plovdiv)
The major aspect Jupiter Square Ascendant is present in Sofia, but not in Plovdiv.

I read some conflicting interpretations. As for rest of Europe, in Prague my Scorpio moon moved to house 4 (house 3 in Sofia and Plovdiv).
In Bulgaria my Gemini Jupiter is in the end of house 9 while in Prague it will be in the 10th - so Prague could be better for career?

Imum Coeli in Bulgaria is in Sagittarius (better for wealth?), but in Scorpio in Prague.
Medium Coeli in Gemini in Bulgaria but in Taurus in Prague -not nice as my Venus is afflicted.
In Prague I have Moon (Scorpio) Square Ascendant (Virgo) but not in Bulgaria.
Neptune Trine Ascendant present in Sofia BG, but not in Prague where Uranus and Saturn trine my Asc.
Of course my best ASC lines and house positions and aspects in relocation charts happen to be in North America and Australia. In the long term overseas migration is the best option I think and now I understand why their cultures attract me more than European ones. When I saw Melbourne on TV I fell in love with it, while I've never felt the same towards London or Paris. :P

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Re: Looking for my place

Post by Jim Eshelman » Sun Mar 11, 2018 11:38 am

I'm going to try to limit what I'm about to say to one more time. (I've set it before, and you are either ignoring or overlooking it; or perhaps I have not been clear enough.)

You are relying on things that are complete {bs}. House placement changes by relocation, and signs on house cusps changing, is complete, irrelevant {bs}.

Hereafter, if I see any reference to these things in your posts on this thread, I will just ignore your post.
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Re: Looking for my place

Post by martin88 » Mon Mar 12, 2018 5:26 am

Oh ok, very sorry. It's just that every astrologist looks at different things and to me it's very very complicated. :roll:
I couldn't find anything about detecting allergies in a birth chart. I'm starting to think all my health issues and depression are all related to inflamation from a food I am intollerant to. I think wheat is the most likely culprit and to a lesser extent sugary stuff. :)

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Re: Looking for my place

Post by Jupiter Sets at Dawn » Mon Mar 12, 2018 8:51 am

The only thing necessary is your birth data, from which people can look at your chart. You don't need to throw out all this stuff. It's just confusing, when it's stuff we don't do or subscribe to on this forum. This isn't a general astrology forum. We use a very specific kind of astrology and you're throwing out a lot of stuff that's unrelated for no apparent reason.

If you think you have a food allergy, go to a doctor and ask about an elimination diet. It's better to go to a doctor rather than try to do it yourself with instructions off the internet. They can often eliminate some things with a simple blood test or refer you to a nutritionist.

While everything may be shown in the birth chart, most people who say that only find "everything" in hindsight. That right there should tell you something.

martin88
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Re: Looking for my place

Post by martin88 » Tue Mar 13, 2018 6:03 am

I’ve thought a lot and came to conclusion going back home like in the same city as my parents would be the best for me. Don’t know if I have a karmic connection to them or what but I feel terrible even living in a town 25 miles away from them. If 3 years living abroud thought me something it’s that I basically live for the summer/Christmas vacations when I can be close to them. I wish I could be like other people my age and be confident without them having to be around me but I guess it’s not for me. I literally came to life when my cousing and mom came to visit me abroad for a few days and that was on a Pluto line so it’s not the places that much but having my relatives close to me. With them I feel rooted/grounded, without them I feel falling apart even if living in the same country as them but a different city. The irony is I can barely stand my dad when back there, yet I miss their energy when abroad. I don’t know how to cut emotional cords with them so I can grow up really, I did visializing but doesn’t work so living abroad with no relatives is not an option if I want to keep my sanity.

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Jim Eshelman
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Re: Looking for my place

Post by Jim Eshelman » Tue Mar 13, 2018 7:07 am

Well, you are a Cancer - strong family (especially parental) ties - and your Moon-Jupiter opposition is along the meridian. Moon on IC is especially strongly psychologically rooted in one's foundations, e.g., with family ties. If this is natural to you, then fulfill it.

In fact, you have just given me a clue on why Moon lines have been difficult for you: They enhance your needs to be close to your parents, and you feel the separation more acutely. (It's just a theory, based in what you've said. Do you think it might be so?)

BTW, you have some rough transits right now, so be good to yourself. On the neutral-to-good front, Pluto is opposing your Mercury - things are blowing your mind, expanding your perceptions, repatterning the way you think. But, right now, Saturn conjoins your Neptune This can emotionally dark. You might look that up in the transit section: Basically, it stirs the darkness in your psyche (especially stirring old, unresolved patterns), and "pushes your buttons" on physical and emotional security, among other things. It's useful to bring you in touch ith your own shadows-monsters, and then it will pass.

Then, today (the last couple of days, and a couple of days more), Mars conjoin your natal Saturn-Uranus. These are stressful days when we tend to break things (look them up in the Transits section for details) - and this can mean breakups of unresolved problems. Stuff is happening in your psyche! Truth is fighting to get out.
Jim Eshelman
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