Natal Birth Chart Reading Request

[onelove]

Hello, I've been looking for some help to understand myself better through astrology and have been led to this website. Most specifically, I'd like to know where to move. I've lived on my chiron line basically my entire life and experienced many painful lessons and I'm tired! But a part of me wonders if I'm meant to stay here to continue to become that "wounded healer"? Any insight regarding this is greatly appreciated. Thank you in advance!

My birth info is Jan 26, 1986 at 12:57pm in Abbotsford, BC, Canada

[Jim Eshelman]

Hello, I've been looking for some help to understand myself better through astrology and have been led to this website. Most specifically, I'd like to know where to move. I've lived on my chiron line basically my entire life and experienced many painful lessons and I'm tired! But a part of me wonders if I'm meant to stay here to continue to become that "wounded healer"? Any insight regarding this is greatly appreciated.

OneLove, welcome to Solunars. - You are indeed very close to a Chiron line - only minutes from your Ascendant at birthplace - though I've never agreed with the "wounded healer" idea of Chiron. People with Chiron strong typically have a love of breakaway freedom, devouring life experience, and often gaining and disseminating wisdom.

You also have Uranus closely angular at birth, less than 2° from Descendant, which duplicates that demand for freedom and renewal. The hardest thing in your birth chart for birthplace is an exactly Saturn-Pluto conjunction not visible in the zodiac: The mundane conjunction is formed by Pluto 3°35' below Descendant and Saturn 3°56' below Descendant, putting them 0°21' from each other. This doesn't exhaust the powerful energies of the chart, with your Sun-Venus conjunction exactly square Pluto; and you feel all of it intensely with a Cancer Moon only a few degrees from an angle.

Your strongest needs are those presented by Uranus (by its angularity) and Pluto (by square to Sun), followed by Venus and Saturn. This translates to your strongest needs being for freedom and renewal, the chance to compel your senses to be awake from exposure to new things, and the need to be left to unfold yourself authentically rather than according to other people's rules and arbitrary expectations. Despite this strong need for autonomy and even solitude, your Sun-Venus conjunction shows a strong need for giving and receiving of love, affiliation with others, and play. (Does this 30 second assessment seem about right?)

So, returning to your main question: What kind of life do you want? We can find other locations where your life will have a different quality (e.g., it wouldn't be hard to move east 9° of longitude and put Jupiter on Midheaven - just to mention the most immediately obvious. Do you want to stay in Canada, or is the U.S. or another continent an option? What sort of place do you want (urban, rural, particular culture, particular social or political bent, particular kind of scene)?

[onelove]

Yes, that all is very accurate. I grew up in a very strict household so getting my freedom is all I ever wanted!

I would ideally like to stay in Canada, thinking of Toronto as I lived there before. Alberta is my Jupiter line but I need more convincing to move there lol. West Vancouver and Vancouver island has my heart but I assume that’s still very close to Chiron for me. US is not an option we’d consider right now but anywhere else in the world I’m very open to! I feel stuck where I am (my birth city). I’ve left a number of times but always had to come back due to family.

I am stuck in the middle of wanting to live in the city or a quiet countryside so I’m honestly open to suggestions and why they’re good for me and I can go from there to make the decision.

What happens if I just want to stick it out here? Do I just brace for a life of pain?

[onelove]

This part of what you said “devouring life experience, and often gaining and disseminating wisdom.” is exactly the career path I’m struggling with. I can feel it in my bones that I should begin writing. Share my life experiences in order to help others. But the fear of judgment I feel around this is paralyzing. My brain knows why I would be beneficial for this type of work, but my body literally hits a wall and can’t do anything with it. I’ve been trying to work past this for years. Any advice with my astrology?

[Jim Eshelman]

What happens if I just want to stick it out here? Do I just brace for a life of pain?

That's too extreme. I think it would be hard, though (pr, at least, letting things that are currently hard persist).

You have Sun in Capricorn. A majority of people with Sun in Capricorn have hardship, especially in early life. There are especially autonomy issues, particularly strains between obedience (for sake of safety) and feeling the need to be self-sufficient and self-determining as early as possible. With your Capricorn-Cancer luminaries it not surprising that there were "parent issues" that have strongly formed who you are and how you respond to others. (With Venus in Capricorn, you likely carry "daddy issues" into your adult relationships.) These things can be outgrown as we mature and claim our own autonomy or self-sufficiency, though many people need to put some distance between themselves and the original family to do that.

You've been through your Saturn return just before age 30. If you are going to be able to own dominion over your own life, it likely would have stabilized about then. In a few years, you'll hit what I call the "age of oppositions" or "middlescence" - midlife crisis, in common language - during which every planet out as far as Uranus will oppose itself. The usual reaction to this is that we get restless and feel "there has to be more," and many people make enough of a shift that it's as if they start their second adulthood.

What I've just discussed is true no matter where you live. If you continue to live at birth place, it amplifies the freedom vs. limitation constraint. That Saturn-Pluto mundane conjunction just below Descendant, with Uranus just above Descendant, drives this home. These are things that are location-specific. BTW, here is a link to more information on Saturn-Pluto aspects: viewtopic.php?f=16&t=177#p1171

[Jim Eshelman]

Toronto doesn't highlight anything in particular in your chart. If you went further east, to about Ottawa, it brings out your Neptune, though that's not something I'd usually recommend.

I understand why you might not want to pick Manitoba, though I'll say I enjoyed the time I spent in Edmonton years ago ant that's exactly where your Jupiter line goes (and not far from Calgary). Edmonton also plays up your Neptune (almost 3° above Descendant), but Neptune connected to an exquisitely strong Jupiter is entirely different from Neptune on its own.

Do distinguish the best latitude along that Jupiter line, we can look at parans (latitude-specific aspects). You have several of these, tightly packed, along the latitude range of Manitoba and most of them are quite good - specifically good in the sense that they speak to freedom, change, "new life." Parans from just above Edmonton moving south include Mercury to Venus and Uranus, Jupiter-Uranus, Sun-Uranus, the exact Jupiter-Neptune crossing, then Venus-Uranus and Uranus-Pluto. Then there is some freakier (but not bad) stuff with Neptune-Pluto as you approach Calgary, and a Sun-Saturn not far south of Calgary - so I think I'd lean Edmonton instead of Calgary for best results. If I were picking a spot for myself, I think I'd pick the Sun-Uranus or Venus-Uranus parans which dominate the space between the latitudes of Slave Lake and Lac la Biche. (I don't mean those spots so much as their latitudes, with the perfect longitude being due north of Edmonton. For example, Athabasca.

Using Athabasca as an example, you have Jupiter 0° 24' from MC and Neptune 1°33' from Descendant. For the parans, you can see how close the parans are from the following RAMC list:

309°00' Sun on MC
311°05' Venus on MC
312°49' Uranus on Dsc

I'm just tossing ideas at you, brainstorming. Edmonton itself loses these close Sun-Uranus and Venus-Uranus contacts but is very close to the latitude of a Uranus-Pluto paran that stands a good chance of revolutionizing your life!

312°41' Pluto sets
314°37' Uranus sets
(These numbers change very rapidly with small latitude differences at that high latitude.

I'll take a quick look at other parts of the world.

[Jim Eshelman]

If we had the whole world to pick from for you, I'd start by noticing that your Sun-Venus is exactly square Pluto, so you can't have Sun and Venus without having Pluto. That's not necessarily bad and may, in fact, be marvelously intense. (I've lived under exact Venus-Pluto for 40 years or so and love it!) - Your Jupiter is unimpeded. so I could pick spots with your Jupiter angular, or spots with your Sun-Venus angular, and maybe the best is somewhere with Jupiter strongest and Sun-Venus(-Pluto) close.

With that in mind, let's see what we can see. (I won't try to get to precise. If anything interests you, we can narrow it easily enough.)

In the Western hemisphere, besides that Jupiter-MC line, you have the following: Sun-Venus crosses MC in fairly uninhabitable (mostly hard to reach) parts of BC and Yukon. Probably not ideal. Sun-Venus also rises in northern Brazil, around Fortaleza. Sun-Venus square MC is also in Brazil but moving west, so that the lines touch Rio de Janeiro (Venus closer and Sun near) and Brasilia (Sun closer and Venus near).

None of the planets we want appear in Europe and Africa, and I suspect you don't want the parts of Iran and -stan states around the Caspian where you have Sun-Venus in the Middle East. You do get a nice Jupiter line (IC) in Pakistan and Afghanistan, and another Jupiter line along the India-Pakistan border. (I just mention for completion.)

You have Sun-Venus lines through the middle of Australia, but that's not usually where people would want to go. However, you have Jupiter square MC on Australia's east coast, passing almost exactly through Sydney (between Sydney and Newcastle). The same Sun-Venus lines that go through the middle of Australia also go through southern Japan, with Venus almost exactly at Osaka or Kyoto.

Is that enough to start chewing on?

[onelove]

Thank you so much for a detailed reply! For a very long time my partner and I really considered Edmonton. We do go there often and really enjoy our time there, plus it's extremely affordable compared to where I am now. It's funny, I absolutely can't stand Calgary but I really enjoy my time in Edmonton. I guess we should reconsider this as it makes sense for a variety of reasons including the astrology.

Kyoto, Japan feels like a place I need to visit at some point in my life and stay there for an extended period of time. This gives me added reason to move! No, I'm not interested in the middle east, I was hoping somewhere in the UK would light up!

So all in all in regards to Canadian locations, Toronto is ok, Edmonton is best, and BC I should basically stay away from living? Not even the island? Do elements like being surrounded by water make these planetary effects "easier" in any way?

[Jim Eshelman]

So all in all in regards to Canadian locations, Toronto is ok, Edmonton is best, and BC I should basically stay away from living? Not even the island? Do elements like being surrounded by water make these planetary effects "easier" in any way?

I don't know what the last sentence means. - As for the rest, there isn't any significant difference astrologically between where you live and anywhere in the general Vancouver area. In fact, the farther west you to, the worse it gets in some way. To take an extreme: Port Hardy does start to scoot your Venus toward the MC but the main thing it does is move the Saturn-Pluto closer to Descendant (Pluto 0°07', Saturn 1°27', with a mundane Venus-Mars-Saturn-Pluto square structure that looks pretty brutal. Here is the mundoscope so you can see how close things are to the angles for Port Hardy. (Positions are plotted around the prime vertical and displayed in 30° even divisions so the angles and other house cusps are at 0°/30°).

OneLove Porty Hardy mundo.png

[onelove]

Nail on the head with all of that. I suffered from all types of abuse as a child and always felt scared/unsafe/unstable. That feel echoed within me and created a lot of issues in my life until I began healing myself.

Does the freedom vs limitation constraint mean that's something I'll always struggle with within me? I realize it also matters where my husband is for us to live a happy life together. His birthday is Jan 23, 1982 at 1:50am in Kamloops, BC, Canada if you don't mind checking him out as well to decide a common ground for us both. We're looking to start a family soon so being in the right location to help us be the best parents we can be is really important to me.
Toronto is our #1 choice at this point but if Edmonton really seems great for the both of us then we're willing to make the move there!

[onelove]

I was thinking in terms of elemental influences if being surrounded by a body of water would lessen some negative effects.

I realize my partners placements also come into play. Do you mind seeing what places would be a happy medium for us? His birthday is Jan 23, 1982 at 1:50am in Kamloops, BC, Canada.

Thank you so very much! This decision has consumed me for a very long time

[Jim Eshelman]

Nail on the head with all of that. I suffered from all types of abuse as a child and always felt scared/unsafe/unstable. That feel echoed within me and created a lot of issues in my life until I began healing myself.

What I think I forgot to mention is that, as harsh as Saturn and Capricorn are on the young, the pattern tends to reverse as one ages. Life gets better (perhaps primarily because we take more charge of our own life) - Saturn is even the key to longevity (look how long our former president Jimmy Carter has simply endured or persisted).

Does the freedom vs limitation constraint mean that's something I'll always struggle with within me?

In a sense, yes - it will always be basic to your way of organizing your world around you. But, astrology aside, we could say this based on your life experiences in your earliest years. I think you probably understand the healing process: We make decisions about the world as a two-year-old and never get around to changing them, so we end up having our day-to-day life decisions made by a two-year-old until (at a more mature point in life) we make a new fundamental interpretation or decision. People do heal by coming to terms with the experiences they have had and seeing them in a different light.

The metaphors may persist but apply to something new and with different consequences. As a Capricorn-Cancer with strong Uranus (plus that Saturn-Pluto next strongest), you'll probably always feel you're struggling to break free from containment, restraint, and judgment, but what that means and the things you find yourself struggling with and breaking free from, will shift. (We can all use increasing freedom, even when we're free.)

I realize it also matters where my husband is for us to live a happy life together. His birthday is Jan 23, 1982 at 1:50am in Kamloops, BC, Canada if you don't mind checking him out as well to decide a common ground for us both. We're looking to start a family soon so being in the right location to help us be the best parents we can be is really important to me. Toronto is our #1 choice at this point but if Edmonton really seems great for the both of us then we're willing to make the move there!

He's a Capricorn like you but with Moon in Sagittarius; and he has Jupiter rising. So there are some significant similarities and some significant differences between the two of you. An important similarity is that he also has a strong Uranus, almost as strong as his Jupiter (it's on a minor angle, the Eastpoint). Jupiter, Uranus, and Mars all signal stronger needs for him than Saturn the Saturn needs, even though he is a Capricorn so that his survival, material needs are strong.

Edmonton, which for you seems like a revolution in your life with newness and opportunity seems like a similar fresh start for him: His Jupiter and Uranus essentially flip priority, so that Uranus is within 1° of Eastpoint while Jupiter is 6°40' from Ascendant. (He still has his natal Jupiter even stronger so he's not really losing Jupiter.) I think you would share a Uranus adventure: Freedom, renewal, fresh start, lots of changes. His Sun-Mars square gets stronger by location: He has both Sun and Moon (especially Moon) aspecting Mars at birth, but in Edmonton there is a stronger mundane (location-based) Sun-Mars (masculinity enhancing, proactively expressing his assertion and "go out and conquer" side).

Where you have nothing angular in Toronto (no location-centered stuff one way or the other), he has Moon, Mars, and Neptune - Moon closest. This doesn't feel comfortable - maybe even toxic. He also gets a mundane (location-based) Moon-Saturn square. I'd say this is especially not a good place to start a family happily.

[onelove]

That’s so interesting! I was looking on Astro.com with their astrocartography tool it seemed like his Chiron runs right through Edmonton. He was very set on Vancouver island, particularly Nanaimo. But I guess overall Edmonton would be best for us both and our future. We are looking at a location that would help him grow particularly. Does Athabasca work for the both of us if we prefer that over Edmonton proper?

About 7 years ago I did a deep deep dive into my healing and continuing it. It definitely helped me change my perspective on my pain to see it more as a learning curve. It’s been very helpful to come to terms with a lot.

When I lived in Toronto I was quite young (university days) and I would say I felt quite lost there despite the freedom. Maybe too much freedom at that age lol.

Thank you for all of your time and effort to help me. You’ve been incredibly insightful!

[Jim Eshelman]

I was looking on Astro.com with their astrocartography tool it seemed like his Chiron runs right through Edmonton.

I'm never going to rely on an asteroid or other minor planet to define an area.

He was very set on Vancouver island, particularly Nanaimo. But I guess overall Edmonton would be best for us both and our future. We are looking at a location that would help him grow particularly. Does Athabasca work for the both of us if we prefer that over Edmonton proper?

As we go on, I'm not going to have time resources to go back and recalculate things I've already said (or even review what I said before) - so, whatever I said about that for you is probably what I'd say again.

As for him, it's essentially what I said for Edmonton but slightly weaker (still the dominant factors). Uranus is 1°26' from EP, which is close enough to be the main force (although the stronger "discovery and freedom" push is in Edmonton due to a small difference in longitude.) His Jupiter remains about the same, 6°26' from Asc. - Bottom line, not much difference.

When I lived in Toronto I was quite young (university days) and I would say I felt quite lost there despite the freedom. Maybe too much freedom at that age lol.

Oh, when you've had a restrictive upbringing, getting to the other side of the continent and having personal freedom is exactly what one needs! <s> Besides, Toronto is a great city: For most of a decade I went there once or twice a year, so know it reasonably well and like the vibe of the city very much.

Thank you for all of your time and effort to help me. You’ve been incredibly insightful!

I'm happy this has been helpful.

[onelove]

I've been studying whole sign astrology so to see myself from a sidereel perspective is so different so grasping myself as a Cancer moon compared to a Leo moon is so odd lol. I do see the accuracy and the Cancer moon in me as well as the other differences in signs. Why does sidereel shift like that? How do I now choose which astrology method I want to continue with as I find them both from my practice to be accurate for me and some others

Toronto is such a vibrant city. The diversity is what I wanted to go back to. That city made me grow up a lot and I'm thankful for it. Going there after a very, very strict upbringing was overwhelming sometimes lol but I enjoyed it nevertheless.

Out of curiosity, what would Yukon, Canada be like for us?

[Jim Eshelman]

I've been studying whole sign astrology so to see myself from a sidereel perspective is so different so grasping myself as a Cancer moon compared to a Leo moon is so odd lol. I do see the accuracy and the Cancer moon in me as well as the other differences in signs. Why does sidereel shift like that?

A better question is: Why did astrologers move away from that? The Sidereal zodiac was the only zodiac used in the first (more or less) 5,000 years of astrology's history and then, by a bit of wrong thinking, some astrologers got the idea that the zodiac should be linked to the vernal equinox instead of actual space and actual stars. Since the vernal equinox retrogrades back along the zodiac about one degree every 72 years, it just keeps dragging the zodiac back with it - until it is almost a whole sign out of whack.

Here are some links to more complete analyses of your Capricorn Sun and Cancer Moon.
viewtopic.php?f=13&t=35#p164
viewtopic.php?f=13&t=34#p145

How do I now choose which astrology method I want to continue with as I find them both from my practice to be accurate for me and some others

They can't both be true. Think of this: Both Tropical and Sidereal astrologers think Venus and Mars are essentially opposite in nature. Both think the nature of a sign matches the nature of the ruling planet. Both agree that Venus rules Taurus and Libra and Mars rules Aries and Scorpio (though everybody throws Pluto in there somewhere).

So... with all that agreement... it's nonetheless true that Tropical Taurus is essentially the same space (4/5 of it) as Sidereal Aries. That same space cannot be simultaneously like Venus and unlike Mars (Taurus) and like Mars and unlike Venus (Aries). Can do the same for Tropical Scorpio and Sidereal Libra, for Tropical Libra (where Venus rules) and Sideral Virgo (where Venus is in her fall) and numerous others. If all the things above that astrologers of both schools agree on are true, then somebody is simply getting it wrong.

OTOH, I understand that people build identifications with zodiac images over the year (almost like brand loyalty) and build some pieces of their own self-view around the labels they're using at the moment.

Toronto is such a vibrant city. The diversity is what I wanted to go back to. That city made me grow up a lot and I'm thankful for it. Going there after a very, very strict upbringing was overwhelming sometimes lol but I enjoyed it nevertheless.

Agree. It's a great city. And certainly one of the two most cosmopolitan (maybe THE most cosmopolitan) in Canada.

Out of curiosity, what would Yukon, Canada be like for us?

Parts of Yukon (as I mentioned the other day) have your Sun-Venus on Midheaven. More or less the central part by longitude. Planet lines change very rapidly up there because of the latitude, so we'd have to pin something down very narrowly. (We were thinking of having my wife's last birthday up on the Alcan and worked hours pin down an exact turn off on a small road that would maximize the benefits of her solar return. Half a mile different threw everything in a different direction.) - Your husband has a Jupiter line slice diagonally through the center of the Yukon. If you could coordinate those in some small piece of tundra, it would be a good astrological spot.

[onelove]

We would be interested in Whitehorse, Yukon. That appeals to us more than Edmonton right now as we love the nature on the pacific north west.

I will have to begin reading more in depth regarding side reel. My family is from India so I’ve been aware of Vedic astrology for some time but didn’t like following it because I found it very superstitious from the Indian astrologer way of doing things so I think I initially felt apprehensive to learn side reel seeing the similarities with Vedic.

[Jim Eshelman]

We would be interested in Whitehorse, Yukon. That appeals to us more than Edmonton right now as we love the nature on the pacific north west.

Whitehorse doesn't have the angularities I mentioned for other parts of Yukon. For you, it has somewhat wide angularities - not super strong except perhaps your Uranus, which is already strong. It would definitely alter your point of view because the main thing besides the Uranus are mundane (locality-based) aspects of Mercury to Neptune and Pluto. Here are the moderately-to-closely foreground planets:

Neptune Dsc -7°23'
Mercury MC -5°30'
Pluto Dsc -4°06'
----------------------- <angles>
Uranus Dsc +2°15'
Saturn Dsc +4°05'

Similarly, your husband doesn't get the Jupiter line there - it's too far east. He has nothing exactly angular, and the two closest are Saturn 6°06' above Asc and Jupiter 7°53' below.

I'm not sure it's a good place to settle, but you can look at the specific energies and decide, of course.

I will have to begin reading more in depth regarding side reel. My family is from India so I’ve been aware of Vedic astrology for some time but didn’t like following it because I found it very superstitious from the Indian astrologer way of doing things so I think I initially felt apprehensive to learn side reel seeing the similarities with Vedic.

Traditional Indian astrology is indeed highly superstitious and (other than a similarity of the zodiac) almost unrelated in method to Sidereal astrology.

I'm in the course of spending three years writing a comprehensive book on Sidereal astrology - bringing my 50 years' experience all together to make sure it's recorded - but that won't be done for a while. For someone already knowledgeable in astrology, you might find this short section useful as a starting point: viewtopic.php?f=8&t=2259
 
PS - I was thinking I remembered that Abbotsford had a significant Indian population and, from your tone and remarks about your family, I thought perhaps that was your background.

PPS - After a few more posts, your forum status will change and you will be able to see some parts of the forum currently hidden to you. One sub-forum is a place where I am posting (for regular participants) drafts of the chapters of the book. You are welcome to access these for your own use only, not to circulate them in any way. They are still incomplete, but there is a lot there. The book is structured with three different layers of instruction in the same chapters - Foundations, Intermediate, and Expert. It's meant to be three textbooks in one. I strongly recommend you to pursue only the Foundations material until you are completely comfortable with all parts of it.

[onelove]

Thank you very much for that access, I will use it respectfully.

Yes, there is a huge Indian community here but also in many parts of Canada now. Being born and raised here to immigrant parents brings A LOT of challenges I think for most immigrant families regardless of what country they're from. The beliefs, values, way of life is challenged so much. It brings a lot of learning curves and difficulties at times unfortunately.

I'm having a really hard time accepting the fact that I should move out of BC. We were very set on moving to Vancouver Island, Nanaimo particularly. There's this stubborn part of me that beliefs that I can "work with" the energies and make them less malefic for myself. Is this ignorance?

[onelove]

I was reading through your cancer moon traits. That is definitely me! As I’ve been working through my healing journey and getting to know myself, I’ve realized I absolutely love cooking, dancing, I would love to act, I’ve always felt the need to write, and work vigorously in mental health it help as many as I can.

I’m at a cross roads regarding career. Which way should I go? I’m willing to go back to school. This is my other big dilemma I can’t seem to make up my mind with. Is indecisiveness a symptom of my Saturn/Pluto crossing? I over think and jump around too much in my head, talking myself into and out of things.

[Jim Eshelman]

Astrological vocational analysis means finding occupations that fit a person’s character. It requires a preliminary analysis of the entire birth chart to understand all strong themes in your character and how they mix to describe you as a whole, complex person.

Possibilities are endless! To help us move directly to something meaningful to you personally, please answer the following questions when you ask for an astrological vocational assessment:

1. What sorts of vocation interests you?
2. What kind of work have you done before that you liked? That you did not like?
3. Are you already studying, certified, or licensed in a field? How do you feel about those areas?
4. Please name three or four or five fields (or kinds of work) you want to seriously consider. For each, please give a sentence (just one or two sentences) about what each job means to you (why you feel positively or negatively about it).

After assessing the main themes in your natal chart, we will compare your background, interests, and wishes to what the chart shows of your character and suggest what field(s) best match who you are. (Sometimes the answer will be already evident in the summary you write for us. Sometimes, it will require specific insights from your horoscope.)

[onelove]

What sorts of vocation interests you? - therapy, teaching, writing. Most recently acting has felt like a natural calling which is surprising as I've always felt camera shy.
What kind of work have you done before that you liked? - marketing - That you did not like? - retail sales
Are you already studying, certified, or licensed in a field? - I have a business degree. How do you feel about those areas? - I'm no longer interested in pursuing a corporate business job.
Please name three or four or five fields (or kinds of work) you want to seriously consider. For each, please give a sentence (just one or two sentences) about what each job means to you (why you feel positively or negatively about it).
- Behavioral Psychologist - due to my own traumas I have learned through my healing journey how psychological it is. I feel a passion to get into this as a profession and create better methods of healing to pass on
- Writer - I feel a strong calling to share my life experiences to help others. This is a consistent thing that comes up for me in dreams as well. This paired with speaking such as a podcast.
- Actor - In a similar way to feeling the calling to be a writer/podcast, I feel with acting I could share stories from my own experiences in the form of storytelling through movie or TV.

I become shy to pursue any of these as they all feel so BIG but I know I can achieve it if I truly believe in myself.

Something I found interesting I wanted to share. Sooke, BC is the town that is probably the closest I could get to my Pluto/Saturn crossing. I felt a strong pull to visit there this summer. We spent a week there, which I enjoyed being out in nature but it was a tough trip. I had a throat infection and horrible toothache the entire time. No amount of medicine helped. I was irritable with my husband basically everyday. But I did enjoy my time in nature. That was absolutely beautiful and the reason I would definitely visit again. What's interesting is regardless of how difficult it was for me, I considered moving there after feeling as if it could be a place for me to really grow. This is all before knowing what aspect is there. Considering it's such a difficult placement, the "pull" feeling in my heart to that location is interesting to me.

[Jim Eshelman]

A remark about Sooke first, then back to the vocational: In Sooke, though neither your Saturn nor Pluto is EXACTLY angular, they are clearly strong and the strongest angularities in the chart. What's really interesting to me, though, is that Saturn-Pluto are just about as close as they can be to an exact mundane aspect. If we assume (for sake of discussion) that your birthday is precisely accurate, for Sooke you have Saturn 2°43' below Descendant and Pluto 2°44' below Descendant - meaning, they are 0°01' apart mundanely. That is definitely a place that the Saturn-Pluto maximizes.

Returning to the vocational question, one thing that is true of Capricorn Sun people is that they are natural story tellers. As I read through the things that interest you most, it seems clear to me that one thing they all have in common - in the way you want to do them (rather than the way someone else might want to do them) - is that the involve story telling. I suspect you really want to tell stories, especially want to tell your own story, and especially want to tell it in a way that can contribute to other people.

There are other things in the chart that speak to these same fields (your Cancer Moon adds a lot to all three), but I wanted to single out this one characteristic. Do you think this is correct that you really want to tell stories, especially want to tell your own story, especially want to tell it in a way that can contribute to other people, and this is at the core of what you want to do with your life right now?

And if so (and if this is a new understanding), would you adjust any of your answers above?

[Jim Eshelman]

A few general assessments, working toward a recommendfation:

You clearly don't mind working hard, even in rough conditions, though the Sun-Venus also enjoys comfort. (You're not used to an easy life and don't seem to be pursuing one.) You are flexible, fluid, adaptable, able to take problems and tasks to accomplish and figure out how to make things work and get done. You don't seem to have a strong need to lead (the strongest motive to do so would be to keep others from telling you what to do): You would be more comfortable working in service to someone or something else as long as you had autonomy. Whatever you do won't be a cookie-cutter version, you'll have your own way of approaching it (these fields mean and look like something different to you than they mean and look to others). Despite the Sun-Venus, I think you would want to be more solitary, more alone in your work, than with a group of people with whom you frequently interact.

Do you think this is all true? Anything you need to change?

After we have narrowed this a bit and confirmed your motivations and what these things mean to you, I'll look at the question primarily in terms of your luminary signs and angular planets - Uranus, Saturn, Pluto, a little Moon plus your Capricorn-Cancer luminaries. (These and the rest of this paragraph are notes to me.) Of the four Gauquelin types, primarily Saturn. (Midheaven in Capricorn and Venus in Capricorn as supplemental. There are a lot of Saturn themes in all of this!)

Your Double Rim (Capricorn-Cancer) luminaries were consistent with the business management direction simply because you're one of those one-in-nine people who set people and processes in motion. That has to be used somehow. You can read about Rim types here:
 
viewtopic.php?f=13&t=36&p=168#p171

[onelove]

Yes, that’s exactly it. I want to share my story hoping it will somehow help others. The mode of sharing this is what I’m unsure about. I have a strong fear of judgment. This is cultural and due to some trauma. (Working through this!)

No, I’m not afraid of working hard. I am willing to do whatever it takes to do this right. I have felt I need this for years but haven’t taken any action yet. I don’t know if it’s because it’s timing or not being ready but I feel I’m doing the work to get there.

[onelove]

You described my work ethic to the T. I don’t mind working with groups, but prefer alone and do it my way. I don’t like being told what to do (I used to think this was due to my Leo moon in western astrology. Not sure what I can blame this on in side reel lol).

I’ve visited and stayed in Edmonton for periods of time and I do always feel very free there. Before I knew my Jupiter line crossed through there, I always felt I can breathe easier there and just felt overall more relaxed. We have been discussing it more and are considering the move more seriously.

[Jim Eshelman]

You described my work ethic to the T. I don’t mind working with groups, but prefer alone and do it my way. I don’t like being told what to do (I used to think this was due to my Leo moon in western astrology. Not sure what I can blame this on in side reel lol).

It's mostly your angular planets. Uranus loves independence, and the mundane Saturn-Pluto conjunction just below Descendant really emphasizes it. These behaviors are also consistent with your Capricorn Sun which is more or a lone wolf. Autonomy, self-direction, not wanting to be screed by other people's stupid standards, work hard and find your own ways that actually work - that's your Sun-sign and those angular planets.

I don't know if you read the link I g ave you before on Capricorn Sun. (You said you read the Cancer Moon.)

[Jim Eshelman]

You likely could do any of your "big three" preferred vocations very well. Ther key is to take the story-telling angle into each of them. (That's obvious for writer or actor, but needs to be at the heart of therapist, also, if you go that route.)

Perhaps I see therapist least. Nothing in your chart says you can't do it (and your Cancer Moon wants to comfort others and has the empathy). But your chart doesn't really scream "therapist" to me. I think if you did it, you would really be using a therapy context to do what you REALLY want to do - and a personal or family therapy practice doesn't seem to use your best strengths.

HOWEVER, with just a slight tweak... with your business degree and today's trends - without going back to school to become a licensed therapist you could immediately become a life coach. (Same thing, different angle. In some areas, this doesn't work well unless you get some sort of license or degree to go with this, but your biz degree may be sufficient. Nor does it stop you from getting any extra training you want along the way. It just means you don't have to wait.

That one is interesting to me because it's still barely defined so you can be more or less what you want, do it your way, invent it with your tools - even incorporate writing and teaching in your approach. It's one a thought!

On acting, given you are camera shy, how about stage acting? You can do more visceral stuff that way. You surely would have avenues in local and regional theaters. Your Cancer Moon has the instincts (more Acadamy Award winning "best actors" have had Cancer Moons than any other - people like the late Alan Arkin (and he flourished in theater before and during his film career). I could go on and on about that, but for a Cancer luminary (in this case, Sun) who has had a stunning run of high impact, emotionally gripping roles and much success, why not binge watch everything Hilary Swank ever did? BTW, you may find that you need to mix acting with production and project management roles.

As for writing - that's just story telling. I can tell you have AT LEAST basic writing skills (and perhaps much more than you've had reason to show here). If you have stories to tell, start writing - you need not wait for anything else to ripen.

I still have a hunch that something more individually definable, like life coach, could combine all these things at once. The hardest thing people find about that (presuming they are suited to it) is how to market it - and you have marketing experience you enjoy using.

BTW - just for fun - I have an example chart file of almost a thousand public figures with well timed birth charts. Four of them have a Capricorn Sun and Cancer Moon - and it's an interesting list given your background and interests: Faye Dunaway, Judy Blume, Lord Byron, Omarosa Manigault. Dunaway also shared your Mars sign.

[onelove]

I’ve looked into life coach many times and continue to think about. I also was just thinking last night about writing children’s books (Judy Blume reference). Side reel really is proving to show its accuracy!

I think I could very well get over my camera shy if I wanted to. I find myself changing rapidly, becoming more true to myself. I agree with it feeling like a combination. In my head, it’s felt like writing a blog or podcast. Sharing my story in a way to help others like a life coach. For example, I went through this type of abuse, I was able to heal like this, share that knowledge and hope people will take something away from it to help themselves.

I used to love writing stories when I was younger. I read a lot as well and do now as well but not as consistently as I’d like.

I have a lot of fear regarding doing this though. I think it’s cultural conditioning mixed with fear of judgement to be my true self so openly. It really is that freedom vs restraint. I want to speak openly and not care what others think or say but the fear of it feels almost physically paralyzing.

[Jim Eshelman]

Regarding camera shy and much else that you mentioned above... Muy wife saw the prior post and said I should have mentioned starting your own YouTube channel. It would develop all these skills and, depending on how you themed it, provide a platform for the kind of "tell me story and aid others in healing" work you want to do.

I suggested that might be cultural elements that would make this more difficult. She mentioned an Indian woman's channel that deals with very severe things that impacted her directly, like honor killings, and has managed to discuss this movingly without shaming or blaming parent or culture.

Just another idea.

PS - It's sidereal ("sy-dare-ee-uhl"), not side reel

[onelove]

Not so much cultural, have you heard of Bollywood? Arts is pushed quite a bit, especially now within the culture. Typically the more religious families would be opposed to it. I've thought about YouTube before. I just feel scared to put myself on a public platform like that and be open to ridicule and judgement. That fear is what's preventing me from doing this.

Thank you, I will remember it the correct way

[onelove]

I did real the Capricorn sun link as well. In sidereal, does rising sign mean much? Seeing that it puts me as a Taurus rising I'm curious about that. Different than the Gemini rising I thought I was!

[Jim Eshelman]

I did real the Capricorn sun link as well. In sidereal, does rising sign mean much?

Not much. Or, rather, it's the most superficial side. (I had an Aquarius-Libra friend with Gemini rising who used to say this meant his most superficial side was really superficial.) More like the clothes you wear for an occasion.

Seeing that it puts me as a Taurus rising I'm curious about that. Different than the Gemini rising I thought I was!

To the extent it's valid, you can read Taurus Sun or Moon to get the general feel. Here are some concise summaries:
viewtopic.php?f=13&t=1909

[onelove]

I’ve been sitting with this for a while. Edmonton seems like a no brainer but why do I have SO much resistance? Is there something in my chart that makes me want to hold on to the west coast and no accept what’s best for me?

[Jim Eshelman]

Only guessing since I don't know you personally...

You have struggled a long time. Is that kind of struggle (doing combat with something) so embedded in your picture of yourself that simply having a nicer, less "keep fighting for everything" life seems bad? (Selling out? Giving up? Missing the combat? ... I'm making this up, of course.)

[onelove]

This is exactly what it feels like to me. I’m feeling very frustrated with myself. Many years ago I began feeling deep inside of me that I’m so used to the struggle that I feel like everything has to be difficult. Moving to a Jupiter line feels like I’m giving up on the challenge and taking the easy route but why don’t I deserve to live easy and simple and happy? I’ve spent a lot of time in Edmonton.
Before I even know anything about astrocartography I felt a gentler and easier energy in Edmonton and I truly tried to figure out what it could be energetically that makes it feel so calm and safe for me. It’s also much more affordable out here and we have some of our best relationships in Edmonton and I would like distance from my immediate family, so again, all a no brainer! But I still hit this wall mentally of not being able to accept it.
My husband is on board with anywhere we choose as we both work remotely. We’re expecting a child now as well so we want to have a happy home. Something easy and simple which Edmonton serves. It reminds me of the simplicity of the 90s. Small town, close community, connections, but with all the big city amenities
Any advice on how to get out of my head on this one?

[Jim Eshelman]

First, congratulations on the pregnancy

Second... when you're getting beat up every day on the school playground by three bullies that just won't stop pummeling you, there is an understandable desire to pull together your strength, throw them off you, and beat them silly so that they never touch you again.

Or, you can just wiggle free and leave the school yard. This is especially a good choice if you just want the fighting to stop. However, if you actually like the fighting and have something to prove to yourself, it might not be a good idea.

You're something of a scrapper. You've been finding ways to stand up for yourself your whole life. You're an adult now: Is a young girl (you as a young girl) still making your life decisions because she once made a decision you've never changed?

How do you want your child to grow up? Give birth on the school yard in the middle of getting pummeled? Or someplace nicer?

Despite any bias in my questions, it's really all up to you. What kind of life do you actually want to have? The amazing thing is that you have a choice.

I will give one strong piece of advice in which I believe very strongly: Never make any life decision based on a hope or belief that somebody else will change. You have no control over their changing and it's none of your business, no matter how much their current behavior affects you. You have more or less three choices: Stay where you are and expect things to be exactly the same. Change yourself. Or leave.

Maybe you prefer things rugged and rough?

[onelove]

Thank you!

What would changing myself look like? I’m not afraid of doing the work in that sense. I feel I have done that a lot over the last several years.

I definitely don’t shy away from working hard. Intuitively, I feel a strong pull to be on the island for a while to work further on myself. I feel I have some deeper work to do and I’m wondering if that’s the Saturn-Pluto crossing pulling me closer to pay attention to some things within me? I mentioned before how I travelled to the tip of the island for one week to do some deeper internal work. The entire purpose of my trip was that. A place I’d never been before or has a big tourist attraction. And I realized after that about the Saturn Pluto crossing being so close.

Is this how these planets work? I can see myself in Edmonton at some point but just not yet. I truly feel I have some deeper things to address/work on out here but not quite sure how to work with these planetary energies and where I should be focusing or what they want me to be paying attention to?

[Jim Eshelman]

It sounds like you have made your decision, then. If so, then commit to it. Pin it down. Don't waste energy doubting yourself. Know that you have picked the psychological and physical conditions in which you will live and that it is 100% your own choice to have those exact conditions. Never feel victim to them. Remind yourself anytime things get rough that this is exactly what you asked for.

I mentioned before how I travelled to the tip of the island for one week to do some deeper internal work. The entire purpose of my trip was that.

You can, of course, live in Edmonton and travel when you want to the tip of the island. (However, you seem to be making a different choice.)

I can see myself in Edmonton at some point but just not yet. I truly feel I have some deeper things to address/work on out here but not quite sure how to work with these planetary energies and where I should be focusing or what they want me to be paying attention to?

I could summarize them, but that wouldn't necessarily describe the exact form this takes for you. The best tactic I know is to develop the knack (by self-observation) of noticing the moment you start to resist or back away from some reality (circumstances that confront you). In that moment, consciously choose the reality - choose the present. - Don't surrender to it consent to it etc., but actively choose it as if you were choosing dinner off a diverse menu. Choose it and move into it. Doing this, day by day and year by year, gradually you will dismantle the resistant reactions your past has wired into you.

Life will bring you exactly the work you need to do on yourself. If you try to plan it out then you likely will unconsciously make plans that help you avoid it. Let life bring you the confrontations you need. Don't work on yourself in a vacuum, do it in the flow of your life. (You can think of this as karma - it's a related, connected idea - though I am talking about it primarily from the perspective of how you have wired your subconscious mind in your present life.)

You can read about Saturn-Pluto here: viewtopic.php?f=16&t=177#p1171- It is primarily brutal, isolating, and enduring. It's main themes are solitary survival, confrontation with a usually harsh reality, and persisting against hardship. There is more to it, of course: Perhaps the details on that page will help or you can investigate how these energies work in your own mind and life.

It's useful to understand these things about yourself. In terms of work going forward, though, I think it's more important to let life bring you the things to confront and accept rather than try to plan it out.

[onelove]

I’m sitting with this to understand why I feel this way. I’m beginning to feel it may be because I’m afraid of what moving there will bring. How it will change my life. This is something that has made me nervous for a while and it’s as if moving to a Jupiter line will highlight some amazing things for me but I’m afraid of that. I feel fear

I’ve struggled with inaction around a lot of things because I’m afraid of all the opportunity it may bring. For a while I was happy here because being isolated and focused inwards is what I wanted.

What could living on this Jupiter line bring me?

[Jim Eshelman]

Contentment, opportunity, leisure, a deeper sense thst the world is inherently good. Perhaps prosperity. More chance to grow yourself by devouring things available for you to explore.

Stuff like that.