James Condor 2024 Solar return

[James Condor]

Had a new birthday yesterday.
January 9 1984
11:28 a
Valparaiso Indiana

Please when you get a chance, see what my new chart brings

[Jim Eshelman]

As mentioned in the Club Aldebaran thread, your Solar Return this year is primarily Jupiter-themed. Here is the full breakdown of the active factors:

r Sun on WP-a -1°28'
t Jupiter on Z -0°53'
------------------------
t Pluto on Dsc +6°33'
r Pluto on N +2°22'

t Moon co r Jupiter 0°34'
t Moon co r Neptune 1°15'
t Moon sq r Moon 1°41'
t Moon-Mercury co 1°53 M'
t Moon sq r Mercury 2°05'
t Moon-Neptune sq 2°09' M

t Pluto sq r Pluto 2°52'

Transiting Jupiter is most angular - within a degree of Zenith - and SSR Moon exactly conjoins your natal Jupiter. This is a great combination! Things should pretty much go your way this year and it should feel pretty good. Also, your Sun is strong, suggesting that you are more in the driver's seat taking charge of your life, and perhaps in the spotlight, receiving unusual attention.

Most of the aspects involve SSR Moon to your natal Moon-Mercury-Jupiter-Neptune quartet. Besides the Moon-Jupiter, the most interesting to me is that Moon aspects both natal and transiting Mercury. This will be a year of unusually great flow of information - your information needs are heightened and you seem to be in the middle of it all (back to school, in a new business environment, or simply taking up an absorbing new topic of interest, for example). In general, the other sets of planets are strongly idea-related (your whole Mercury-Jupiter-Neptune triplet in Sagittarius) so you have lots of opportunities to indulge curiosities.

The only non-lunar aspect of note is Pluto square natal Pluto (with Plutos being widely angular). You'd feel this even if it weren't foreground because it's your main transit of the year. Pluto to Pluto indicates times of change, but these are mostly psychological changes - drawn into private reflection or introspection as psychological patterns reshape themselves. This is building over the next couple of years. Pluto is also square your Mars, as it has been for about a year (we've talked about this before). You still have a couple of years before Neptune reaches your major four-planet combination, though you may occasionally feel this when it comes to angles of lunar returns during the year.

You've moved out of the progressed Mars-Saturn period - it ended several month ago after enduring for three or four years - so the struggles or need for greater effort to tread water should have subsided a bit. You have solar arc directions suggesting some exciting erotic adventuring this year and next.

But overall, it's a strong, positive chart with a lot of dynamism. I suspect this will be an unusually exciting period of your life.

[James Condor]

Ahhh, breath of fresh air!
Thanks Jim
Glad the Mars/Saturn is through!
Glad my chart looks good!

I won’t be as paranoid, hopefully! And maybe I won’t get much drama.

In 2023, I think many people talked about me and created stories. I think former friends betrayed me. And I almost did them too. I had many intense angry outbursts in 2022, 2023! Intense moments. I had many confrontations. I had many paranoid panicked moments. I am not mentally ill. I don’t have a diagnosis.

I think I confused some people. I think made too much noise. I talked too much. I was seen as controversial. I upset some people. And I think they retaliated. It took me awhile to realize.
I didn’t know who to trust.

I don’t know how much extra noise I created in my mind. How much of my paranoia was true? Did I exaggerate it? I don’t know. Much of it, I have near proof. I feel I investigated well. I made some true, serious connections. And it was painful. To think my thoughts were true. That people were conspiring against me!
Does this mean, I was also conspiring against myself?
I don’t know why my sister told me, I was self sabotaging.
Am I that obvious!? Not really? Why do people want to assume this or that about me so often?

But I truly believe a few former friends did try to expose me as something I am not. And, I do know that heavy feeling is gone. And it isn’t like it was a serious debilitating experience. The doom came in heavy a few times!

I saw angles in the summer. Their wings surrounded me on the floor. An angles voice said something like, ‘you’re going be ok’.

And not only that, many people ask me the same questions. And it makes me wonder if they have a script. Robotic. Agents. Very programmed. Simulation like. Bizarre. These are my true feelings about many people in 2023. Being interviewed by random robotic like people who seemed to have a motive. Hmmm? I don’t call it true paranoia, no! It’s like my kind was able to focus on bizarre human things, but it was so erie, at times.

To think I can believe this perspective, though it’s my own experience. Though I couldn’t prove much nor do I now want to investigate it much further. My desire has subsided. I am being purposefully short about every detail of these experiences, btw.

Maybe my blind spot prevents me from seeing my true self at times. At times I think not, at other times in my shadow, a reflection, of me and the world, me and space, me and my mind, consciousness. Can I, can people, create their own reality by navigating consciousness?

The learning experience of being reminded we are one big messed up or not family of peoples.

Anyways. I’m looking forward to the new year!

[James Condor]

Time for me to vent to the forum.
I don’t care to have advice. Just venting.
I wonder why I feel like a detrimental planet. Ofc I could be exaggerating. But this is very real.

I’ve been having somewhat a rough year. I’ve been feeling trapped. Weak. Ofc it could be worse. I don’t have any serious health issues that I know of. But mentally I feel I have less time and patience. I seem to enjoy being alone more than before. Self preservation. Laziness. Sluggish. Anxious. Depressed? Feel like tapping out. I have less motivation than before. I enjoy doing nothing, more than before.

I’m sleeping allot. Watching tv allot. I’m gaining some weight. My motivation to exercise is down. My motivation to socialize is down. I’m not making enough money. I’m self employed and my expenses keep pilling up. I can pay off my debts but I can’t seem to save anything. I don’t know what other job I would have. I like my job because I’m my own boss and make my own schedule. I’ve been feeling stuck.

I expected to have a better year. I am grateful for what I have. Almost daily I write down what I am grateful for. I’ve been writing allot. About suffering and gratitude.

I need to let go more. Surrender. If I’m not willing to change jobs I have to just deal with it. I worry I won’t even make it to retirement and I put a bunch of money in my retirement account. I worry too much for what I think is good reason. And I keep thinking comparing myself to others and I feel lack. I am hard on myself.

At the same time I am grateful for all that people do in this world economy. People do work hard to make things happen. People have skills that I lack and I suppose that makes me feel inferior. As in why don’t I have more skills. I guess I am not as strong as I thought I was. Have I been living some kind of lie. Living too much in my imagination.

[Jim Eshelman]

What a magnificent post! Almost every sentence (one keyword after another) speaks of Neptune's transit to your Moon, Mercury, Jupiter, and Neptune which is one of two major transits this year (the other being Pluto's transit to your Mars and inching toward your Pluto). - Neptune is also on your solar return Moon.

[Veronica]

Thank you for sharing James.

Please, vent away anytime you need.

I had a thought the other day about Neptune and how it reminds me of being caught in a rip tide. I got caught in one for real once as a kid swimming in the Pacific for the first time. Frantically trying to swim to shore and keep above the crashing wave, some young man yelled to me to swim along with it, not against it.

What ever you do, please dont stop swimming.

[James Condor]

Thanks for your replies! I feel better about the support I received

I will swim along with these transits in Neptune and Mars-Pluto.

I just can’t believe what I’m going through.
But I have to accept it and go with it.

I’ve never felt so lazy and stuck before, at least that I can remember. I feel like I’m less than I’ve been before. Way too anxious. I don’t seem to enjoy life as much. It’s very routine. Where is the hope. The light at the end of the tunnel. My memory isn’t as good. I have much love still. I have much empathy still. I just hope people forgive me for being this way. I’m sure they will.

I don’t know what to do with myself at times. I suppose I will get used to it eventually.

[Jim Eshelman]

Sympathetically... yeah, that's Neptune to Moon. Imagine: During the couple of years I had it in my late 60s it was hard (especially in the times it came to lunar or demi-lunar return angles) not to think that I was suddenly aging far faster than expected. All the psychological parts of that and most of the physical parts faded as the aspect faded - but imagine going through the things you listed now AND at a later age.

Not a fun transit. Also (I haven't checked orbs for you), I hope next year's Saturn-Neptune conjunctions don't fall on your planets. It's a really lousy energy. (You might want to look ahead and start shopping for therapists now.)

Just remember: It's transits. It will pass. You will come out the other side and it will be over.

[Veronica]

I was looking for a book on energy this morning and James post came to mind for some reason as I realized the book I thought about was in a different box.

It's so hard sometimes for me to understand tone in the written word, and I realized that I am often very wrong about the tone of words.
I think I may have missed up on hearing James correctly.

In rereading James words today after thinking of them and from his past writings I wondered if its possible that James is in love, really really deeply in love?

I dont want to butt into his personal business or put him in an awkward spot to answer publicly, but some of his strings of words, read with a different tone then I initially did, sound almost like a song secretly speaking of a deep profound awakening of love.

[James Condor]

Thanks again for the replies.

My suffering has some or much to do with
Lost love. Lost relationships.
Many changes.

I had episodes of cannabis induced psychosis back in February or so. So I quit using pot. I lost my relationship with ‘Mary Jane”. In turn I feel less creative. Less intense. Straight and narrow

And before February, before quitting Mary Jane, I lost a few other relationships with two close friends. We don’t hate each other though. We still say hello and have mutual respect.
I said things and texted things I shouldn’t have. I regret many things. I ruminate about choices, words, actions, impulses, images I created or followed.

And I gave up, or eased up, on fantasies or illusions of sex. I may have been a sex addict. So, it is difficult for me to give up, or learn a new angle on how to approach relationships. Difficult to explain this.

I’m pretty sober. Bored.
I’m not in love with anyone right now. I don’t feel as attractive. I feel more dirty, grungy. I feel like the spoke. Not quite at home. Not quite solid, steady.

It’s more about the pathetic energy.

Yeah it’ll pass eventually.