Jim Eshelman wrote:In the example you gave, the Ascendants are near each other, so the charts don't seem TOO different viewed both ways. But the two-wheel display still brings out all the habits and reflexes we're used to in viewing transit "event" rings around natal charts. The real standout, when looking at it this way, is that both have the same Saturn-Pluto conjunction, but it's only on the Ascendant of the woman's chart. She has the Saturn-Pluto rising (and Mars at the Midheaven) from birth, and "lives in a world" where
Mars paran Saturn-Pluto is her basic reality. He... less so. He has the aspect, but it's away from the angles. It's not that he can't see the traits in himself, but they aren't the be-all and end-all of his experience of the world. OTOH, from
her point of view, his presence just reinforces her world-view - it's Saturn-Pluto double-up on her Ascendant and, besides, there's some basis for her observation because he actually has Saturn-Pluto traits, albeit not as demandingly as hers.
The first thing that occurs to me from this is that she sees life as demanding, with burdens to be constantly taken on, and can't understand why he seems to be shirking these. One more example of a woman having to carry all the weight, right?
In fact, though he has these carry-the-load traits, they aren't his main window on the world. Click the Swap button, and we see that he has Venus near the Midheaven, as part of a partile Venus-Mars conjunction. He also has Saturn (more widely) foreground, but not the Pluto. He's capable of working hard, has undergone emotional hardship probably, but mostly sees life as play. (Or perhaps, "do your chores early, then have your time for play.)
He's a Virgo-Pisces. She's a Leo-Sagittarius. View these luminaries through their primary angular planets, and I bet the characters lay themselves out.
Those are the first impressions. Now let's go back and do the closer inspection. Hitting the Swap button to put her chart on the inside, I want to look at some highlights from his planets.
She has a very close Moon-Neptune conjunction. He, of course, has Neptune right on top of these, and it squares his Sun. He is Sun-Neptune (background), she's Moon-Neptune (background). And this, of course, is part of his Sun being partile square her Moon. The Sun-Moon is an excellent draw and foundation. We observe, though, that they are both Neptunian, and are Neptunian in different ways; that there is a very strong, magnetic, mating draw, and that Neptune is inescapably part of it; and that, again, they are both prone to see their own traits in the other, except "not quite right," etc.
The biggest aid to their relationship would be to get how much they are like each other and yet different. To feel the companionship and identity, and also the mystery. Use
mystery as the way to express the Neptune, and be in wonder about it. Be
really really good at seeing their own projections so that they don't have the acute vulnerability of being constantly let down and disappointed by the other. (They are both prone to feeling constantly let down, betrayed, disappointed. They can use witnessing their own projections as the tool to grow past that with each other.)
And his partile Venus-Mars conjunction is on her Sun. Read these aspects. It should also describe a significant part of their relationship.