Another Bad Year or will this year be mixed

[Jupiter Sets at Dawn]

Apr 19, 2012 10:10 pm

2011, as predicted has been a horrible year for me, the main themes in my Solar Return were Saturn square natal Moon, Moon - Pluto, and Moon Uranus, as well, Saturn was angular in my SSR.....I was forced to move from my rental home because of my slumlord landlord, and my catty neighbor, and her 15 year old menacing creature.
I thought I was going to be homeless, thankfully, my mother and the few family members I have found me something, it's mostly a retirement neighborhood. So far so good, but there's still 4-5 months until my solar Return is up, and Saturn is still moving backward making his way across MY SSR DSC.
I am sorry I post a lot on here, I would just appreciate some guidance, I'm not a professional astrologer, just like a person who's not a professional Doctor. I would never dispense medical advice, but I do seek professional and more experienced users to guide me in the right direction. I know I have some more of this cycle to contend with, but hopefully the worst seems to be over.

My 2012 SSR Is as followed
Venus is rising in Cancer, less than one degree away from the ASC mundanely making a square to natal pluto
Saturn is on the IC in Libra about 4 degrees from the IC on the angular side both mundanely and in the zodiac, also conjoining to natal Pluto.
Venus is making a 150 to an 11th house Jupiter, though not in mundo, I know aspects in mundo are stronger, but will an afflicted Venus still be offered some protection even though this aspect is just throughout the zodiac?
This "stellar Combination" will be creating a paran.. I don't think this has anything to do with romance, I am really afraid that Saturn on the IC will somehow make me face homelessness again. I've also read that this this placement indicates trouble with family, and I really can't go through that, the only family I have is very few, and if I loose them I loose everything.
Hopefully I will also be returning to school this year, so with natal Pluto being activated by these two planets, I am really horrified, it seems as though my loner gene will become activated? not to mention Uranus going backward and then forward over my natal venus!

Solar Moon...SSR Moon will be closely opposite Mars, as if this were not bad enough, it's over my natal Saturn. They will also be creating a paran in October, with Solar Moon going on to partilely progress Natal Saturn

The EP and WP are once again over my natal moon indicating some sort emotional influence.
Jupiter is also making a 150 to an angular natal Pluto gain through loss?
Neptune will still be making a 150 over my natal moon(good for worship maybe) and not good for practical purposes, obviously, Neptune will also be opposite my natal Mercury! So I am still going to have some possible anxieties,mental issues, or problems learning after being out of school for so long? Neptune is still square the Zenith, which not good for practical. purposes such as career, ect.

Saturn will also be making an exact 150 to natal Mars.....another bleh aspect. I don't know why the universe had made things so difficult for me the past 5 years. I know I am suppose to stand on my own two feet, but, there have just been times where I have been hanging on by a thread. This Mars Neptune Progression on the DSC which will be around for a while, so many Neptune influences in my life have just left me almost in pieces. There's also a grand trine involving the moon, Mercury, and Pluto.

My kinetic looks okay, Jupiter is exactly on the Midheaven, but it's making a 150 to Saturn. A partile Venus-Neptune opposition(in the background) could be highlighting relationships. Any help would be greatly appreciated, they really don't write any thing on how multiple transiting Solar planets react when over a single natal planet, or over a hard natal aspect ect. I know the basic nature of Saturn-Venus, but not when it excites natal pluto on the Nadir.

[Jupiter Sets at Dawn]

By the looks of it you are going through your saturn return, and your progressed lunar return was not great either. I had the same two years ago. How is your year going so far?

[Jupiter Sets at Dawn]

I see transiting Saturn conjunct natal pluto, pluto square the ascendant as well as transiting pluto conjunct natal moon which could indicate family issues to work out, and a certain degree of isolation or withdrawing into yourself. By the looks of it the coming year is likely to be focused on "re-thinking" (isolation in this case achieves its purpose) , it is a mercurial year, however not without the current paradigms being challenged and somehow attacked by others and you fighting your corner ( natal mercury conj solar mercury, solar mercury conj natal mars, solar mercury conj natal uranus, solar mercury trine solar moon). Always look at the Solar moon when you want to see health issues. This year it makes an opposition with mars, which could indicate health issues, and low tolerance level (especially of other people). Venus on the ascendant looks promising though, as well as jupiter square the sun.

i don't know how accurate this interpretation is, as I have just finished reading Jim's book, I am a beginner at interpreting solar returns. I hope the more seasoned astrologers in this forum can pinpoint where I have made mistakes if I have made them.

I have attached your chart using the campanus house system. I personally don't use porphyry...

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[Jupiter Sets at Dawn]

I hope no one minds me posting an udpate, I really wanted to post one since Freya showed such an interest, and I hope I can help others with interpretational skills of the SSR by posting the results thus far.
Anywho, It's only been a month, but things have not been that good, Even though I returned to school, I feel very isolated being 28, there's some older very pretentious women, but they run around acting like children which I refuse to do.
Finances have not been well either, income is taking a nosedive sadly, trying to look on the bright side of things but as the holidays approach it is making me more depressed than usual.
Family/Relationships, I have been spending a lot less time with my due to school, and the fact that I am still depressed.
My health, as pointed out by Freya's interpretation of the SSR Moon/Mars opposition has been difficult as well. I take a hormone called coritsol which we all need to survive, and sadly, it's always fluctuating due to the fact that I take it in pill form, cortisol controls inflamation, so tada, I've been suffering because of all the excessive inflmation in my body (Moon/Mars).
Not only does this affect me physically, but it affects me mentally, because the imbalance and inflamation cause anger and mood swings.
It's barely been over a month, so I doubt the main events have transpired yet.
Venus in the foreground, even though it's afflicted, being aspected slightly by Jupiter...I hope something good comes of this year.

[Jupiter Sets at Dawn]

Hi Venus, I am sorry to hear that you have not fully recovered yet. Have you tried to break down your solar return, by looking at the quarti solar or demi solar?

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Update, well, since Jupiter went retrograde over my sun, I've been feeling fantastic! Even though I have not made a real friend at college, people seem to be flocking to me a little more. My health has actually been awesome for the past few weeks. I got stuck with cruddy neighboors again, but I am trying to keep my distance! I have solar moon in opposition to Natal Saturn in Jan, so I am a little apprehensive.

[Jupiter Sets at Dawn]

Well, yesterday as we all might know was Thanksgiving here in the US. The holidays, a time for stress, and empty pockets, the holidays for me were no exception. My aunt, one of probably only 3 real family members that I have was in the US, so we decided to invite here to Thanksgiving. Well, my aunt, even though she lives right above North Africa, has always had a special talent for making me feel as though I don't exists, and my mother sadly, for fear of rejection from her sister in law cannot stand up to her. Well, Pluto and Uranus were exactly on the DSC/IC for thanksgiving, and my Solar Moon came into exactly a degree of apllication natal Saturn. Let's just say the Turkey was not the only thing that got stuffed for the holidays, a physical fight ensued, nothing major, but it left me feeling horrible with no support. I have two months of this junk to go because of the SSR moon.

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Venus wrote:
…and my Solar Moon came into exactly a degree of application natal Saturn.

Yikes, I understand. Sometimes getting together with certain family members over the holidays is a downer without Moon-Saturn symbolism.

[Jupiter Sets at Dawn]

Yes, and I was diagnosed with a horrible kidney infection yesterday, characterized by intense pain in the flank area.

This is from a progressed Moon event? Remind me, please, what's the aspect and the Moon's sign?

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Moon Sign is Aries, opposite Natal Saturn in Libra, as well the solar return Moon contained an opposition to Solar Mars in Libra.

Yup! Kidneys from the Aries Moon.

I dont mean to sound happy with your discomfort. (I'm not, and you have my sympathy.) I am happy, though, that (as happens more often than not, the Moon sign pegged the body part.

[Jupiter Sets at Dawn]

[quote="Freya]As an aside, does this moon-saturn-mars combination affect teeth as well?

I can't remember what part of the teeth is related to what astrological symbolism
Thank You for your well wishes

To Jim, Libra is the sign that seems to be associated with kidneys, why would aries have any affinity. Is it similar to what I was reading in the sidereal handbook where people with afflicted planets in Leo tend to have heart problems because of Aquarius?[/quote]
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Not because of Aquarius... but because Leo likely rules the back. Fagan made a strong case that the traditional list is likely 180 degrees off. Experience tends to confirm this.

In practice, I think there polarity effect - that it sometimes flips.

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Wow Jim, that is amazingly crazy, 180 degrees off...Is that just for anatomy
Its so crazy how the traditionalist put the kidneys with virgo, and some say libra, but there's stronger evidence to suggest Aries!

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Jim...do you remember what astrological symbolism is associated to teeth? I can only remember clearly that the fix star Algol is associated to teeth problems, but I can't remember which planet combinations or midpoints cause teeth trouble. Do you know?

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Jim...do you remember what astrological symbolism is associated to teeth? I can only remember clearly that the fix star Algol is associated to teeth problems, but I can't remember which planet combinations or midpoints cause teeth trouble. Do you know?

Teeth are complicated. The bone structures themselves (including teeth) are Saturn. But signs pertain to zones of the body (whereas planets pertain to systems and functions). Libra is zoned for anything in the head in general.

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It's really crazy, my mother has Gemini/Sag on the ASC/DSC axis, with Venus exactly on the dsc, she has the most feminine body, with very pronounced hips

I don't notice the planets causing body shaping - just pathology. What you describe could just be from Venus foreground. (Curves! Venus gives a lovely face and curves.)

[Jupiter Sets at Dawn]

I thought that since Gemini ruled over thighs, it would also rule over hips, and buttocks

I wasn't commenting on the attribution, just the theory (which I thought you were applying) that an angular Venus in a sign means that the sign's body parts are particularly beautiful, feminine, etc.

But, hey, shall we take a look

(Later.) Well, I tried. Of the women that have been most important in my "attraction" history, I found 13 with a foreground Venus distributed in eight different constellations. What did I observe? All are but one women that the world in general would characterize as "beautiful" or "very pretty"; or, where there was irregularity of features, they are "attractive" in the magnetic, drawing-in sense. Basically, the closer Venus was to the angle, the more the "very pretty" adjective applied.

But it's hard to break it down by body part.

The only one that wouldn't have been considered "beautiful" or "very pretty" by most people was one of the two women with Venus foreground in Libra. One certainly wouldn't say "beautiful of face" was her hallmark. (Ditto for the opposite parts of the body attributed to Libra in most text books, kidneys <g>, buttocks). I think she was an exception because her angular Venus in Libra was conjunct Saturn, and her Moon-sign and Moon aspects gave her a tendency to present herself "outside of convention," mostly avoiding any self-presentation that could be considered to fit popular standards. The other The other foreground Venus in Libra was universally considered pretty in her 20s, and degenerated due to health concerns thereafter. Again, the angular Venus was in close aspect to Saturn.

But, overall, the basic attractiveness, prettiness, shapeliness, feminine sensuality etc. is a mark of all the rest, but it's hard to separate it out to one body part or another.

For example, consider the signs potentially attributed to breasts: of the two women on my list with Venus foreground in Capricorn, one has attractive, shapely breasts and the other has very modest breasts. The one example with Venus foreground in Cancer had very rounded, somewhat larger than average breasts. (In all three cases, their knees were neither more nor less attractive than the rest of their legs - to take the other pole of the axis.) Yet these were not the women on the list with the largest, or most strikingly beautiful, or otherwise most visually distinguished breasts - those "honors" went to two Taurus Suns with Venus in quite different signs (and one woman who didn't have a foreground Venus).

So I think the angular Venus characterizes attrativeness, prettiness, shapliness, etc. overall - but not distinguished by the Venus-sign's body part.

[Jupiter Sets at Dawn]

I was wondering, what about beauty through surgical intervention, like that show on Fox a few years ago, the Swan pageant, would Venus come to the foreground through maybe progresssion or Solar Arc in this instance? The reason I ask is because a very close girlfriend of mine is have a plastic surgery, she's saving up a lot of money for this, but it won't happen for like a few years, and I am trying to pinpoint for her the time it might come to pass.

[Jupiter Sets at Dawn]

Side Note, My mother's birthday is on Janruary 31st this year, featuring a Saturn/Sun Square Saturn being 8 degrees and 4 seconds above the Ascendant in Mundo, Well, today, she found out her health insurance had been cancelled due to the fact that the A-Holes at her place of work neglected to send out her new enrollment, but now they've taken the offensive and claimed they did send out, and that she's lying! I pick up her mail, and I would have seen it, we're very vigilent about that sort of thing. I hope this is not foreshadowing of events to come, because right now, even though I am a lot better, my mom is still kind of my rock.

[Jupiter Sets at Dawn]

Side Note, My mother's birthday is on Janruary 31st this year, featuring a Saturn/Sun Square Saturn being 8 degrees and 4 seconds above the Ascendant in Mundo

That's rough. Sounds like a fight!

I thought I'd look back, though, and see how past years have been when I've had something similar. I've had four SSRs with close Sun-Saturn hard aspects. Only my 2011 SSR had these foreground (Sun 5 and Saturn 8 degrees above the Descendant in mundo). The hardest thing about the year was dealing with health and finance issue for my mom - marked by the rising Moon conjunct Uranus and square Pluto. Work was harder - more demanding - and the various circumstances depleted my income stores a fair bit. (For example, I made more money in that 12 months than any single year of my life, and ended up with coffers more depleted at the end than at the beginning.) I also have had a nagging health issue originating in that SSR and carrying over into the next - nothing serious, just a persistent nuisance.

So, yeah - stuff I'd call "bad." OTOH (just to give persepctive), my project organizing the family to handle Mom's affairs was a substantial success, I did earn more money than anytime in the past, my mate and I are extremely happy together, and - oh, yeah, I lost 40 pounds (by design) under that SSR, which improved many aspects of my health significantly.

I just mention all this to say: It can be tough, and we still survive and even thrive. That doesn't mean you won't have crap to deal with.

The other years I had a Sun-Saturn close hard aspect in the SSR were:

1974. 2° square non-angular (with Sun also conjunct Mars, and the Mars-Saturn was partile). I left my wife and moved from my home state to California,m the biggest leap of my life. (And, with both of the before and after conditions, I was essentially broke and (once in California) relying on friends all the time.) - The move was more marked by Moon, Mercury, and Uranus on the angles.

1981. 3 1/2° conjunction, middleground, but with Sun 3° from Jupiter on the other side. Not a good example, therefore. (It covered the middle of my two-year stint at Astro Computing. Really good money for the time, and - interesting when compared to the prior 1974 - not separated from my mate, but living apart most of the week since she stayed in LA and I lived in SD, going one way or the other on weekends.)

1990. 2° square, background; and Jupiter was right on the Midheaven in the degree of its exaltation, with Pluto rising. I was extremely prosperous while working hard and enjoying it much. One of the rare "quiet years" of my life with things already started going very well, and nothing shaking things up.

1997. 0°17' opposition, background. This was a hard year, though. I'd broken my foot a month or so before my birthday and was laid up for months. This impacted earning. Fortunately, my law practice was winding down, but it was also the year I finally closed it and started living off savings for a while. Thjere were other 'separation' characteristics, but I also learned some vital lessons about delegating and accepting help. Venus, Pluto, and Mars were the three planets clustered on the IC, and Moon was 2° from conjunct Neptune (which is probably the convalescence).

[Jupiter Sets at Dawn]

Thanks So much for your response Jim, I was wondering, about Saturn.....aside from the loss, does Saturn have the essential quality of bringing things to the surface.

Certainly if you have been unrealistic - say with Neptunian blinders - Saturn will snap you into the demands of pragmatic reality.

are the hardships that you face because of Saturn meant to teach you a lesson about areas in your life that need to be handled in a better way than you are handeling now? Highlighting weakness and vulnurable spots to strengthen them?

I don't know if "meant to" is right... but it's certainly what they do! Yes, many Saturn transits (especially those to the Sun in my experience) "grow" us - We have to handle more than we previously thought we could endure, and somehow we grow enough to do it. All sorts of things get cleaned up along the way. It's quite common to have people complaining about all sorts of "insoluable" problems for years until Saturn hits and then - wham! - they have a new problem so much bigger than the old ones that they manage to solve the old ones almost overnight. It's the useful aphorism that the way to solve all your problems is... get a bigger problem!

[Jupiter Sets at Dawn]

I know that, solving a problem with an even bigger one!
Moon/Saturn, Sun/Saturn has obviously always been the dreaded tax auditor of the cosmos
I know that Returns occur simultaneously, and the closest analogy you can give for this is a choir, and the strongest voices win! I was just wondering though, hopefully this will alleviate my mother's Return if her birthtime is correct, but she has kenetic in March, with Mercury rising, squaring Jupiter, and a triple conjunction of Venus, Sun, and Uranus, with an eventual 150 from Kenetic Solar moon to the Mercury/Juptier square, might this alleviate somewhat the harsh Natal Return?

[Jupiter Sets at Dawn]

Well, it's been 5 months since my last return, and so far, nothing earth shattering or depressing has happened with Venus/Saturn symbolism, the most depressing thing that has happened is probably my aunt being a complete witch. Even though we have not had any conflict, she's been a lot more withdrawn from my mother and myself, and she does not encourage me to visit with the two children who I consider to be my niece and nephew. Ever since I moved, things have just been different, especially between herself and I. Even though I still have a brain tumor, and am doing everything to get rid of it, my health is returning back to normal, and I look foward to stopping pain killers this summer.My mother is doing okay so far, but with Uranus Moon and Sun Pluto square in the foreground, we're bracing.
I guess lately, I've been just having this strong urge to pair up, and find someone who wants to be in a romantic relationship, and meets my standards, they're not rediculously high, but they're not limited to just breathing and genitals.
With my Saturn return the biggest thing I've encountered is confinement, not physical but mental, such as being confined with labels, female, sick, race, ect.

[Jupiter Sets at Dawn]

I started reading the science of getting rich, and this book really inspired me to share some news with everyone that I didn't want to share because I was afraid of jinxing it. Anyway, a few weeks ago, under Jupiter opp my Uranus, I got a letter in the mail. Around December, a case manger for one of my classes encouraged me to apply to a bachelor's program in a larger town, it's a really amazing university. Anyway, a few weeks ago, I got an acceptance letter, and a recommendation from one of the selection committee members for their masters in Nursing program in the future. It's amazing news, but it's not 100 percent fulfilling, maybe 70-80 percent. Anyway, I started reading the science of getting rich, and the entire book applies to astrology. It talks about current environment, and how you can grow into a new environment, and as well, it talks about attracting abundance. This book does not only apply to monetary gain, but to spiritual gain as well. It's really ashame that the "law of attraction" people ripped of this book and warped its meaning to conform to a self seeking and over indulgant society. It's really a short simple book that explains itself well, and does not use any flashy, pretentious gimmics like colages or dream posters, just the power of positive thinking, and priortizing what's really important in life.

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Venus, I think you may have discovered a key for your life. Beleive me--just one book can make a huge difference in your life's Work on any level.

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Ditto. That book helped me a lot when I was broke. I am not reading another book by the same author, Wallace Wattles. It's called "The Science of Being Great". If you haven't read it I recommend it

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Thank You both Steve and Freya!
Freya, I'm a little bit over half done reading the book, I have slight ADD, and reading books, no matter how interesting they are has always been a challenge, especially with all the stiumuli there is out there, like internet, school, ect. Anyway, I'll probably make some time this weekend. I'm obviously a very neurotic and obsessive person, and I just wanted to know, how did the book work for you. Did you attract abundance into your life. At this point, It would be nice to be rich, but all the other aspects that abundance have to offer seem appealing. Did you follow the instructions from this book to the letter, meaning shutting out harmful influences like the aknowledgement of negative events or influences in life. I know it's impossible for a long period of time, but I think I can attain some kind of sprints in that area of life.
-Maria

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The answer is yes and it worked from nothing. I was homeless now I own my own home. It has takes a year of constant visualization exercises, plus adding the emotion behind it, to do it. But it works if you have faith that it will work in the end.

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goodness Freya, the only set back I have is dealing with fantasy, not being unable to tell fantasy from reality, but getting wrapped up in fantasies, it's odd, you'd think I'd be rich, because I used to live a rich fantasy life.

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...not necessarily. Daydreaming, fantasy life etc, are different from the creation, repetition and vitalisation of a targeted thought-form to achieve what you want. But that's only my opinion....

[Jupiter Sets at Dawn]

Well, In regards to my Moon/Mars Partile opposition, As pointed out by Jim, with the librarian influence, I have been ill from my kidneys, but it is clearing slowly.
I went into this year carrying some baggage from last solar year, I didn't want to discuss it because it was so stressful, but since things have been going favorably according to my lawyer, who was placed on retainer by my aunt. Anyway, this past year, I slapped my ex landord with a sexual harrassment law suit, for literally harrassing me for sexual favors. Anyway, somehow he got my adress and continued to harrass me, and leave questionable things at my new residence, and a few months ago I caught him on video. He totally changed his mind around the first of June, and has asked my lawyer to settle, I'm not suing for big bucks, but to make a point. Looks like the Solar Return mop up wins again.
Less than 2 months from my solar return and I am excited to see what awaits, not too excited though, don't want to get dissapointed.

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...if you caught him on video I personally wouldn't settle out of court. Then he can continue to harrass his next victim. You are right about making a point Does this show in your next SSR?

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Hey Freya, I don't plan on settling now, I think I'm going to proceed after my next solar return.

[Jupiter Sets at Dawn]

Well, I had Venus/Saturn on the MC/ASC, and an event came about through sadly my indiscretion to get rid of insects. I really blame myself for this event, but I know it was not my fault, animals are stubborn, and I had an especially stubborn animal. A very good family pet that my mother and I have moved in with me this past year, and got into insect poison, my mother and I have been really distraught since his diagnosis of renal failure, her with her Saturn/Sun square until her next return.
I am talking about a nine year old cat that was given to us by my cousin because her son being a toddler at the time had been chocking him, we had this cat since 2004. The entire year my mother and I had been experiencing the undertones of Venus/Saturn and Sun/Saturn, but it seems to have come to a head with the impending death of our beloved pet.

[Quote from a post, where I discussed this in a new way:] The close Mars-Neptune opposition has a missionary spirit (among other similar traits), a hurling himself (usually imprudently) into whatever is the focus of his attention... Mars-Neptune is seriously dopamine-driven, and is a also [an] aspect that enhances his intelligence enormously. (I think that's a consequence of living at high dopamine levels: impulse driven toward a desire, needing immediate gratification and doing more or less whatever is necessary to get it. This behavior pattern gives much higher permanent dopamine levels, and, among other things, that boosts mental power.)"

As for Progressions and Natal Aspects, This is very complicated, and it's a real eye opener. I tapered off vicodin on Aug the 14th, and I have never been able to see things so clearly in my life, and I am thankful that I am dealing with this just a progression and not a natal aspect, or I would be crazy and screwed. When I started using vicodin I was in some pain, but my emotional pain was much larger, so I started using as a distraction, it was not until my Mars/Neptune conjunction that I started using them to get a rush,(pre-astrology) I also began to use food about that time. Even though this aspect is in seperation, I still feel like I need something to give me that dopamine and flood of brain chemicals that I crave so much, thankfully it's controlled through anti depressants and supplements, and the cravings are not as bad as they used to be. I also had a problem with impulse buys this past summer, but thankfully school is starting within the next few days and education is as equally rewarding as a pair of shoes. My aunt was born with Mars Square Neptune, and I always admired her, even though she treated me so badly. She attended college, got her degrees always had beatiful things and was very social, but as I aged I am really starting to realize how horrible her life has been. Due to a very close Mars square Neptune she grew up promiscuously, constantly seeking validation from others, with a thurst for money, and now that she's retired she blew close to 40,000 dollars in less than 4 months compared to the 36,000 she made every single year. This woman has a special room dedicated to all of her "impulse" buys that is just open season for hoarders anonymous, while her home is literally falling apart, she continues to "promise" to fix it so her grandchildren can live in the family home.(Neptune's delusion) During the last ten years she confessed to my mother that she barely sleeps 4-5 hours a night, probably due to the dopamine she gets by gossiping, socializing, gambling or wasting money every single day. She herself is also drowing in debt to the tune of 250,000 dollars. This is just a cautionary tale of how choosing to use planetary energies in a negative fashion can and will backfire if you "abuse" them. I think this is a great qoutation for the negative manifestation of Mars/Neptune "self abuse in the pursuit of fleeting pleasure".

[Jupiter Sets at Dawn]

Maria wrote:

When I started using vicodin I was in some pain, but my emotional pain was much larger, so I started using as a distraction, it was not until my Mars/Neptune conjunction that I started using them to get a rush,(pre-astrology).

Hi Maria,
Mars-Neptune symbolism can act in difficult torturous ‘emotional’ ways with an aggressive dependency on drugs to combat ‘emotional pain.’ Your secondary progressed (sp) Natal Chart features:

sp Mars 04,44 Sag
sp Nep 04,18 Sag
sp Des 04,46 Sag

With this sp partile conjunction of Natal Mars-Nep partile conjunct your sp Natal Descendant, we can easily see this harsh angular symbolism symbolizing your ‘emotional pain.’ It is good you now recognize this harsh aspect with your study of astrology by dealing with your past drug dependency of vicodin. An excellent example of the emotional harshness of a Mars-Neptune angular contact.

[Jupiter Sets at Dawn]

Maria wrote:

I can't just board myself up at home and watch fantasy horror movies all day.

I understand Maria. Secondary Progressed Natal aspects on an angle takes time to wear off, but I think your next SSR will offer some relief with Venus & Jupiter foreground.

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Thank You Steve, my cat actually died on Aug 29th there were no transits in my chart, but my mother's lunar return chart had Saturn 2'20 away from the Zenith. The only indication I can think of is Venus Square Saturn in my SSR, if so the Solar Return mop has been proven once again. Less than a week from my birthday.

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Transits to the SSR are nearly as important as transits to the natal. They have slightly different interpretations, but not much - that would be getting into subtleties. Mostly, you treat them interchangeably.