Solunars by Aldebaran Sidereal Academy

So I wanted to share some realizations I've had about what it means to have un-aspected (unless one counts a semi-sextile to angular moon) background Mercury, after Jim mentioned something about it meaning one feels unheard.

I realized recently how much that has been a theme throughout my life.

For example, my mom has a hole in her right eardrum from a childhood accident, so she couldn't hear out of that ear. She would get very angry if she asked a question and I didn't speak up loud and clear. One of the worst beatings I got from her was when she asked me a question in the car, and didn't hear me because I was in the backseat facing her deaf ear, and I didn't answer very loudly (because I was afraid of her).

As a kid liked singing, doing impressions and creating vocal characters, making weird sounds with my mouth (that's pretty universal, I think ). My family hated most of this. They told me I was tone-deaf, had a terrible voice, begged me to stop.

I hated my voice. It sounded nasal and high-pitched. I prayed in the mirror to sound like the bass singers in doo-wop groups (bob-be-de-bob..). I was a late bloomer, so my voice didn't change until the summer between sophomore and junior year of high school.

As a grownup, I've had issues with mumbling and not being heard, with feeling frustrated with being not listened to and misunderstood in relationships.

This doesn't mean that I am not verbal or communicative. But it does mean I over-compensate. I think somewhere on the site it mentions background mercury as correlating to "conspicuously intellectual" speech.

As a kid, I made an effort to use big words as much as possible. Grownups paid more attention to me when I talked like that.

As a grownup, I've been drawn to writing and music. Feeling thwarted in my need to feel heard, I've chosen media where I can control and edit my words and polish and adorn them with beauty, as a way of somehow making them appealing and worthy of being listened to.

The interesting thing is that over time I have become happier with how I sound. I joke that I smoked cigarettes and drank whiskey until I liked how my voice sounded, then stopped. I'm starting a voiceover company with a friend, and in that context I have gotten a lot of positive feedback for my voice.

And when I feel un-listened to or misunderstood, I let it go, and go write or practice music.

Wonderful report, thanks!

There is also a huge amount of miscellaneous Virgo scattered throughout most of it, woven in and out through the primary content.

Yes. It's hard for me to separate the virgo from the mercury.

Virgo moon - a feeling of having had an unhappy childhood.
Virgo sun - high pitched voice, late bloomer

Some Virgoisms (yeah, you caught where I was going)… besides the first-level stuff of ideas, information, and communication being exceedingly important to you... Some is the general tone you portrayed of this bright, creative kid intent on communicating thoughts, of being in amazement of the world and ideas and wanting to engage with others on that. Some minutia:

Not speaking up (not just fear but a kind of bashfulness that Virgos have).

Voice high-pitched etc. Late-bloomer, tending longer to sex-neutral indistiction than biological sexual distinction.

Using big words and aligning more with an adult communication style (sometimes labelled pseudo-maturity by psychologists who insist everyone should develop at the same pace).

Smoking & drinking.

Oh rad! I didn't think of some of those. Thank you!

It's funny.

Two people with background Mercuries... Among the people I am most likely to take seriously.

Just some feedback on your perceptions.

Jim Eshelman wrote: Wed Aug 08, 2018 10:32 am Voice high-pitched etc. Late-bloomer, tending longer to sex-neutral indistiction than biological sexual distinction.

I think being a late-bloomer is a Mercury trait in general. (Mercury being the pre-sexual planet, as Jim had said a few times.) I have Moon square Mercury partile, but you can't really say I'm a late-bloomer. Well I am a little bit slow, but my development wasn't/isn't much later than the average. Some of my peers, though, had began their puberty earlier, so that contributed to my insecurities during my early teens.

Lance wrote: Thu Aug 09, 2018 6:07 am It's funny.

Two people with background Mercuries... Among the people I am most likely to take seriously.

Just some feedback on your perceptions.

<3

Back at you.

Yes, it's a realization of personality structures that are sometimes out-of-sync with reality.

That depends on whether you assess "reality" as other people's objective assessment (i.e., assessment of you as an object) or the psychological reality of your own experience. - That's reality, too.

Come to think of it, a lot of astrologers need to learn that exact lesson: They would directly connect with people a lot more if they realized that, from an astrological point of view, the only reality that matters is the perception of it from the person inside the box: The chart doesn't show what happens, it shows our responsiveness to, registration of, and collusion to create particular kinds of experiences.

Good point. It might me more reasonable to say "external reality". And eventually acknowledge that the distinction between the two is the least real thing in the mix.