Is It over yet?

[Whichwitch]

Hello again I could really use some help right now. My stress level is at an all-time high. I feel like it would be easier to pull my own teeth out then to make sense of what’s happening in this crazy world right now. I’m in between jobs I have not been in a relationship for the last six years I’ve basically become self-sustaining social hermit- if that even makes sense. I’m starting to feel like Jack Nicholson “is this as good as it gets?

I’m currently living in Beaverton Oregon. Is there anything anyone can tell me regards to my chart, is there a break in sight? Is there anything that I could proactively do To help me through this roller coaster called life? Why can’t I think about normal things and slow down my thinking and just be a normal person? There are days I would love to get into football on Sundays and think blend in like most normal people do. The truth is that bores the hell out of me and has zero appeal, hence I do things alone then have to always compromise. Help! Am I destined to roam the earth ala carte forever? When will the stress and the anxiety of the last year pass or is this the new normal? Doing creative things drawing painting studying new mediums is always fun it is certain point I’d like to do something a bit different. Is this year been {bonked} up for everyone?
Any input at all would be very gratefully appreciated. Thank you in advance.

Dob: 02/18/1965
9:06pm
Los Angeles, CA

I’m attaching my natal chart.

[Veronica]

Hiya

I am sorry you are under stress right now. My life sounds very similiar in ways to yours. I cope with stress by prioritizing my responsibilities and letting go of things that truelly do not need my attention based on those priorities. Which can sometimes be easier said then done.
I dont know if you have done this yet, but you may want to look at your astrology chart for where you are currently living, as well as your natal chart. You have moved and that could make a dramatic influence on the angles of your chart and possibly be a factor in your current situation.
As for the feelings you expressed around how you are spending your time, when I feel similarly I have to push my comfort zone and just do something different, because what I had been doing obviously wasnt satisfying me.
Being between jobs can be very very stressful. I hope that you are able to find fulfilling work soon.

[Jim Eshelman]

WW, my sympathies. Two things clear from your chart are that (1) you'll never be comfortable being "ordinary" or with "ordinary" things and (2) you're going through a particularly rough patch right now - easily identifiable by astrology.

Your Sun is in Aquarius. One of the three words that describes this Sun-sign best is "unconventional." (The other two are "scientific" and "inclusive.") It's natural for you to be provocative and controversial with broad interests yet tending toward solitude, even alienation. This doesn't mean you can't be social - Aquarians love that sort of thing, but usually don't comfortably feel "part of the herd."

Ah, but then there is that rising Moon. Despite your instinct for expressing your individuality without social pretensions, your strongest planet is Moon. This ties you psychically exactly into that herd mind. Very strong in you is the common subconsciousness of all people - all life - if you don't make it conscious it can drive you a little batty. The whole world's mind is in your psyche, and unless you are conscious of this fact it's going to feel like (oh, let's say) a great deal of psychological pressure rising up inside of you from strange and seemingly inexplicable places.

Let me give you an example. I also have an angular Moon (not quite as close as yours) and my Moon is in Aquarius (instead of my Sun, like you). I get really edgy sometimes if I haven't seen an extremely popular movie exactly in first run when it is riding the high-wave of popularity. Why? I've long ago realized that it's because the mass (collective) subconscious mind around me is filled with this and so it's in my mind even if I don't know anything about it. I have to see the movie to make it conscious, so that I am not inadvertently resisting that enormous force of psychic content that is like a wave moving through everyone. It will be in my mind either way, and I need to make it conscious and, at least briefly, submerge myself into it enthusiastically.

Friends, over the years, have been surprised that my tastes don't run to the move avant garde, or avoid anything mainstream and commercial, etc. The real answer is that I can't survive that way (well, I've gotten better over the decades, but still...) and I either submerge myself in that long enough to make it conscious and own it or I go a little crazy.

I'm not sure if this exactly aligns with things you've encountered in the balance of your Aquarius Sun vs. your angular Moon - which are, indeed, somewhat at odds with each other - but I offer it as an example to, perhaps, give you something to think about.

[Jim Eshelman]

Now, concerning that "rough patch" I mentioned.

Your Moon is at 18°41' Virgo. Your birth horoscope and local (Oregon) horoscope Ascendant and MC run from 15°18' to 21°35' of Virgo-Pisces and Gemini-Sagittarius. Transiting Saturn is currently at 18°55' Sagittarius.

Transiting Saturn aspecting your natal Moon (which it is doing very exactly right now) basically means that practical matters do better than emotional ones. It feels somber, distant, cautious, with separation from nurturing, wounded pride, loss, and feeling misunderstood. Security needs increase. Others seem unsympathetic.

All of these transits exist to develop different parts of ourselves, e.g., this one to develop your emotional and practical self-sufficiency, to prioritize alone time and effort (even struggle) above social matters and ease. You can still dip into social matters and ease, but they won't come as easily or as often under this transit.

This placement of Saturn (square your Ascendant, crossing your IC) is also rounding the bottom of your chart. This is broadly recognized as the start of a new 15-to-30-year cycle. Have the last 7 years or so been more a time of withdrawing, turning inward, having released earlier priorities in your life and nurturing whatever comes next? Saturn crossing the bottom of your chart is part of a long cycle that plants new seeds and lays new foundations for things you can bring to fruition over the next 15 years, that will "break into the light" in about seven years - as I said, matters for the long haul. It's good to lay good foundations now, to pay attention to this time, to take seriously what your instincts tell you to create.

Or, as I summarize in my standard "stock" interpretation of this: Get your feet squarely under you! You are laying a foundation for the future. Long-range goals depend on how well you prepare now. Security and property issues are important now. Family relationships can be strained. You assume new self-reliance, and encourage it in your dependents.

This feels difficult to most people. It's rearranging and often leaves you feel alone, alienated. It's natural enough for you to feel strange, atypical, and outside the herd anyway. Perhaps it is reassuring that this is a specific process, continuing for a certain, clear period of time, intending to build a particular side of your being.

Saturn first moved into 1° of your Moon-Ascendant-Midheaven at the start of this year (January 2019) and will last leave about Thanksgiving this year. So yes, you're dedicating 2019 to this set of transits. Along the way, there are specific turning points where the effect may feel more concentrated but, in general, January to November 2019 is the time for this to work its way through your life and psyche.

Some of those specific concentrated periods (a few days either side of these dates): Saturn exactly squared your Moon January 20. There may have been what felt like a gap between 2/27 and 7/4 (when all three were temporarily out of orb), a chance for your psyche to rebound a little. Much of this is coming to a head right now because Saturn is stationary September 18 - we're already feeling it! - while squaring your Moon within 1° August 17 to October 19. Saturn makes the last cross of one of your angles November 16 and clears the whole patch around November 26.

[Jupiter Sets at Dawn]

I’m attaching my natal chart.

I deleted it. It was too small to be readable.
Most of us prefer to draw charts our own way anyway, and the money to store even small charts adds up fast. The only ones we keep are the ones Jim posts as part of his research, and he pays for the storage.

[Jim Eshelman]

Here is a copy of your chart (stored off-site so it takes no forum storage, but displayed here).

[Jim Eshelman]

BTW, WW, I've long thought that you and Veronica (Aquarius sisters at your core) would make great friends. I'm glad she answered so quickly above.

[Jupiter Sets at Dawn]

I think you also went through this but with Pluto instead of Saturn a couple-three years ago. So it feels really familiar, but you're feeling more restricted by it because it's Saturn, not Pluto.

[Whichwitch]

BTW, WW, I've long thought that you and Veronica (Aquarius sisters at your core) would make great friends. I'm glad she answered so quickly above.

Hopefully I can meet Veronica at some point!

[Whichwitch]

Hiya

I am sorry you are under stress right now. My life sounds very similiar in ways to yours. I cope with stress by prioritizing my responsibilities and letting go of things that truelly do not need my attention based on those priorities. Which can sometimes be easier said then done.
I dont know if you have done this yet, but you may want to look at your astrology chart for where you are currently living, as well as your natal chart. You have moved and that could make a dramatic influence on the angles of your chart and possibly be a factor in your current situation.
As for the feelings you expressed around how you are spending your time, when I feel similarly I have to push my comfort zone and just do something different, because what I had been doing obviously wasnt satisfying me.
Being between jobs can be very very stressful. I hope that you are able to find fulfilling work soon.

Hi Veronica, thank you kindly for your response. I apologize for the delay - responding on a cell phone is difficult. I too am having to prioritize my responsibilities, it is the only way I can get through this crazy time in life. I cannot move as I own a home and LOVE where I live. Your advice is good though, and appreciated! <3

[Whichwitch]

WW, my sympathies. Two things clear from your chart are that (1) you'll never be comfortable being "ordinary" or with "ordinary" things and (2) you're going through a particularly rough patch right now - easily identifiable by astrology.

Your Sun is in Aquarius. One of the three words that describes this Sun-sign best is "unconventional." (The other two are "scientific" and "inclusive.") It's natural for you to be provocative and controversial with broad interests yet tending toward solitude, even alienation. This doesn't mean you can't be social - Aquarians love that sort of thing, but usually don't comfortably feel "part of the herd."

Ah, but then there is that rising Moon. Despite your instinct for expressing your individuality without social pretensions, your strongest planet is Moon. This ties you psychically exactly into that herd mind. Very strong in you is the common subconsciousness of all people - all life - if you don't make it conscious it can drive you a little batty. The whole world's mind is in your psyche, and unless you are conscious of this fact it's going to feel like (oh, let's say) a great deal of psychological pressure rising up inside of you from strange and seemingly inexplicable places.

Let me give you an example. I also have an angular Moon (not quite as close as yours) and my Moon is in Aquarius (instead of my Sun, like you). I get really edgy sometimes if I haven't seen an extremely popular movie exactly in first run when it is riding the high-wave of popularity. Why? I've long ago realized that it's because the mass (collective) subconscious mind around me is filled with this and so it's in my mind even if I don't know anything about it. I have to see the movie to make it conscious, so that I am not inadvertently resisting that enormous force of psychic content that is like a wave moving through everyone. It will be in my mind either way, and I need to make it conscious and, at least briefly, submerge myself into it enthusiastically.

Friends, over the years, have been surprised that my tastes don't run to the move avant garde, or avoid anything mainstream and commercial, etc. The real answer is that I can't survive that way (well, I've gotten better over the decades, but still...) and I either submerge myself in that long enough to make it conscious and own it or I go a little crazy.

I'm not sure if this exactly aligns with things you've encountered in the balance of your Aquarius Sun vs. your angular Moon - which are, indeed, somewhat at odds with each other - but I offer it as an example to, perhaps, give you something to think about.

Jim, I had never considered my angular moon having as much weight as it apparently does. Especially with regards to " the mass (collective) subconscious". I will have to put more focus on this than I have previously. The truth is my moon is like a giant (pin the dart in the middle) for me, but I have never really understood how to approach it. Thank you.

[Whichwitch]

Now, concerning that "rough patch" I mentioned.

Your Moon is at 18°41' Virgo. Your birth horoscope and local (Oregon) horoscope Ascendant and MC run from 15°18' to 21°35' of Virgo-Pisces and Gemini-Sagittarius. Transiting Saturn is currently at 18°55' Sagittarius.

Transiting Saturn aspecting your natal Moon (which it is doing very exactly right now) basically means that practical matters do better than emotional ones. It feels somber, distant, cautious, with separation from nurturing, wounded pride, loss, and feeling misunderstood. Security needs increase. Others seem unsympathetic.

All of these transits exist to develop different parts of ourselves, e.g., this one to develop your emotional and practical self-sufficiency, to prioritize alone time and effort (even struggle) above social matters and ease. You can still dip into social matters and ease, but they won't come as easily or as often under this transit.

This placement of Saturn (square your Ascendant, crossing your IC) is also rounding the bottom of your chart. This is broadly recognized as the start of a new 15-to-30-year cycle. Have the last 7 years or so been more a time of withdrawing, turning inward, having released earlier priorities in your life and nurturing whatever comes next? Saturn crossing the bottom of your chart is part of a long cycle that plants new seeds and lays new foundations for things you can bring to fruition over the next 15 years, that will "break into the light" in about seven years - as I said, matters for the long haul. It's good to lay good foundations now, to pay attention to this time, to take seriously what your instincts tell you to create.

Or, as I summarize in my standard "stock" interpretation of this: Get your feet squarely under you! You are laying a foundation for the future. Long-range goals depend on how well you prepare now. Security and property issues are important now. Family relationships can be strained. You assume new self-reliance, and encourage it in your dependents.

This feels difficult to most people. It's rearranging and often leaves you feel alone, alienated. It's natural enough for you to feel strange, atypical, and outside the herd anyway. Perhaps it is reassuring that this is a specific process, continuing for a certain, clear period of time, intending to build a particular side of your being.

Saturn first moved into 1° of your Moon-Ascendant-Midheaven at the start of this year (January 2019) and will last leave about Thanksgiving this year. So yes, you're dedicating 2019 to this set of transits. Along the way, there are specific turning points where the effect may feel more concentrated but, in general, January to November 2019 is the time for this to work its way through your life and psyche.

Some of those specific concentrated periods (a few days either side of these dates): Saturn exactly squared your Moon January 20. There may have been what felt like a gap between 2/27 and 7/4 (when all three were temporarily out of orb), a chance for your psyche to rebound a little. Much of this is coming to a head right now because Saturn is stationary September 18 - we're already feeling it! - while squaring your Moon within 1° August 17 to October 19. Saturn makes the last cross of one of your angles November 16 and clears the whole patch around November 26.

Jim... you NAILED IT with this one. Seriously, I am so glad I made this post, at least I have a clue what is going on - and it really does help to know there is a end in sight. Transiting Saturn aspecting your natal Moon has felt TERRIBLE.

The last seven years have been brutal as F***. Everything I have been experiencing seems to revolve around forcing me to develop my emotional and practical self-sufficiency and being alone.

I really really want to thank you for this. <3. Very much needed and appreciated.

[Whichwitch]

I think you also went through this but with Pluto instead of Saturn a couple-three years ago. So it feels really familiar, but you're feeling more restricted by it because it's Saturn, not Pluto.

Ugh... I’m so over it all.

[Veronica]

BTW, WW, I've long thought that you and Veronica (Aquarius sisters at your core) would make great friends. I'm glad she answered so quickly above.

Hopefully I can meet Veronica at some point!

Lol...thats sweet.
Going through yucky Saturn stuff myself which will be over in few months and Im sure Ill be back to my obnoxiously cheerful and optimistic self..full time.....
Come and see the sites in upstAte NY and shake your saturn blues