Eye Opener

[James Condor]

My boss blew up on me Thursday saying I've been giving him a hard time and stressing him out. He didn't elaborate, as usual, and I think he is going through something and blaming me. I don't always trust his judgment but mostly I think it comes down to our communication styles. He doesn't elaborate and he becomes impatient when I ask him questions. He says I' arguing too much with him. I disagree. I just need clearer instruction so he doesn't rip on my work. The way he behaved, and /or reacted was shocking to me. I found it emotionally immature and confusing. I asked him to make time so we can talk about it. He hasn't yet. How do I trust my boss if we can't maturely disagree.?
The whole thing was an eye opener. I have been contemplating ever since. Oh man, I just remembered that my sister blew up on me back in July! She called me greedy and selfish. I was shocked. I totally disagreed on her point,yet again, contemplated.
I don't see what I did wrong, however, it doesn't help anything. I've been looking more deeply into my character as of Thursday. I don't think I wronged anyone. I think people get jealous and envious and think that I owe them something. Basic human nature. Neither of them were specific as to the real issue. Neither were mature and had a real discussion. But, I contemplated still.
Have I lost touch with myself? My dreams and reality have been more blended. My sleep has been more interrupted. I've been more energetic, competitive, impatient, intolerant. My heart isn't the same. Its more third eye, less heart. I have been more focused on what I enjoy; music, guitar playing, meeting people, socializing, tv series...selfishness, desire, dreams? I've come into my own in a way, yet not spiritually. I've also been more productive. Yet more responsibility is on me I feel. I was feeling attractive, together, fair, good, until this blow up.
So what is going on?, SSR n Venus-Uranus rising, N Sun conjunct t Pluto. I have been going out more, partying, socializing, having more fun in a sense but at what cost? Am I missing a piece of myself? Where have I gone?

[Jupiter Sets at Dawn]

So what is going on?, SSR n Venus-Uranus rising, N Sun conjunct t Pluto. I have been going out more, partying, socializing, having more fun in a sense but at what cost? Am I missing a piece of myself? Where have I gone?

Going out, partying and so on is Venus-Uranus rising. Careful to end the party with enough hours you don't go into work with alcohol in your system.

The Transiting Pluto conjunct your Natal Sun is ticking off your boss. You've been through this already back when Pluto was transiting your MC not too long ago.
Pluto is about 22 minutes from crossing your Sun. It's moving about 50 seconds a day. Once it gets to your Sun it has to continue off the other side before it stops effecting you. This is the fire. You're going to have to go through it.

Dealing with your boss... have you ever read askamanager.com? Try the "topics" => "advice about your boss" up at the top and see if there's anything there you can use, even if it's not precisely your situation. Maybe there isn't, but maybe reading about all the jerks other people have to put up with will make you feel better about your boss. I mean, he's not pressuring you to give his nephew one of your kidneys, right?

[Mike V]

[...] Have I lost touch with myself?
[...] I've come into my own in away yet not spiritually. I've also been more productive yet more responsibility is on me I feel. I was feeling attractive, together, fair, good, until this blow up.

This all sounds perfectly in line with a Pluto transit to natal Sun - radical, ongoing transformation in your conception of self, brought about by sudden, unexpected events if necessary.

I don't think it really matters much if you end up deciding that your boss and your sister are right, or if you're "at fault," or any of that - I think the fact that you're forced to deal with this in some fashion is the important part.

Life is forcing you to re-evaluate where you stand in relation to other people, and who you are. The rest seems to me like just the particulars of that unfolding.

[James Condor]

Thanks for the replies. What happened hasn't been felt in a long time. The weight of it all. Sometime last week I healed up fine. I think by Tuesday I was doing better again, like back to normal.